Monday, April 30, 2012

Packing some balls.

*DISCLAIMER: If you are freaked out about sex toys, have no desire to read anything about me and sex, just skip this damn post right now. Don't read this and be all judgey.

So, you have all heard the hype about the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy. I have read them, obviously, and I'll do a whole post on that and my thoughts and all of that jazz. But the main thing about these books is that it is forcing women to maybe venture outside of their comfort zone and try things they were hesitant to try before.

Now, you know I am no stranger about sex or toys or anything like that, but there were some things in those books that even made me pause. And visualize. And think... OK. I'm down for that.

Coincidentally one of my favorite blogger friends, Shirley, messaged me to tell me she ordered some balls. Specifically, some ben wa balls.
Inserting and removing is easy as both beads have a smooth exterior and are connected to each other by a sturdy nylon string. The secret to these beads comes after you insert them, as you will start to feel vibrations as you move around. These vibrations are caused by two additional balls located inside each of the purple beads. When you move, you will cause the balls to roll around, creating vibrations. When done, you can remove them by pulling on the nylon string loop located at the end. 

Now, in the book Christian gives Ana some balls (*snicker*) and she wears them through a date and it makes her all hot and bothered. I was hesitant. But then I ordered them because they were only $6.95 and I figured hey- I've tried worse. 

They came in the mail on Saturday and what I did not realize was that the balls? Make noise. Yeah. They tinkle. They sound like jingle bells in your vagina, but other people can hear them. When I first put them in, completely awkward. To know you are shoving a pair of connected balls up there, it's kind of awkward and you don't know why people would agree to shove drugs up their hoo ha like you see on COPS and stuff. 

So.. once you shove them in, it's weird. And you have to kind of squeeze to keep them in. Then you start walking around (and doing your own rendition of "Jingle Bells") and whoa. The balls themselves kind of move a little bit, but the ball inside of the ball is what "vibrates" and gives you  happy vibrations all over. I walked up my stairs and holy hell that was kind of awesome. 

I was kind of proud of myself that I was able to keep them in for as long as I did. I went about four hours with them, cleaned the house, took a shower, had some fun time with Matt, and yeah.  It was a great time. I highly recommend you ladies buying some balls. 

The next thing that will be purchased is an under the bed restraint system. Fortunately, my friend is having a party of her own on the 19th so it's going to be a fun time. 


Lemanie said...

Oh Good there is a string you can tug to get them out....I'd be too concerned they'd be stuck up there and I'd have to hop around to get them out! They jingle?? Okay some sex toy engineer needs to take a look at that...=P

____j said...

When I read about those in the book, I thought it was intriguing, but I didn't look into it. But your review has me thinking about it again. EXCEPT that IF I wanted to wear them outside of the house, people would hear? LOL

Ashley said...

I was ballsy and read this at work. PUN.

....lame pun.

Stephie @ Our Marriage Adventure said...

I'm pretty open-minded, and if it were just my hubby I'd be cool with the noise being heard. However we have a 3rd adult in our house and I don't think I could function realizing you could hear me like that. blush!!!

G said...

cool post - one of my friend's nicknames was now makes a lot of sense.

Unknown said...

oh good--you found a Slumber Parties rep in your area! Crap, I hate losing business to someone else but I'm glad you're going w/ us and not someone else! Seriously, as soon as you mentioned the restraint system I was thinking 'wait, I have one of those in my demo!" hehe...I should try it out. I'm really really glad that these books are helping women communicate what they want to their lovers and have more adventurous sex lives. I'm allllll for that.