Thursday, November 4, 2010

My brain.... is overloaded.

Good grief. You'd think I was famous or something with all the crap jammed into my head. Seriously. I'm going to explode soon and not in a fun way.

1. You need to go to my blog bestie Mr. O's blog page and tell him not to quit blogging because I'll be sad and turn emo. Nobody wants emo Sara. So tell him I sent you and you don't want me to turn emo. (The link is fixed!)

2. PayPal is really pissing me off. I have spent a week trying to get my named changed on there because it still lists my maiden name. And this process if fucking ridiculous because it involves faxing them copies of documents and then waiting to hear from them. Well now I need to provide a copy of my marriage license. And I know I paid the $16 way back in 2004 to get it...but yah. I don't have it. Interestingly, I also can't find my social security card with my married name which I know for sure I had one because I had to have it when I had my kids for paperwork. And I know I shredded my maiden name one but guess what? The married one is gone...but the original is here. WEIRD. So now I have to get a hold of the County to get a new record of being married so I can fix PayPal. If I had known what a pain in the ass everything becomes when you change your last name I never would have done it. It fucks everything up and it just makes me angry.

3. I'm excited to go to Krysten's house next Saturday for the blog get together. I'm spending the night so we can shop at IKEA the next day. I think her hubby is nervous about the crazy aspect but I think it's going to be fun. And I'll be on my best behavior. Mostly because I have nothing to provide for bail should we get arrested. It always puts a damper on the party when nobody has bail money. Krysten is making Heavenly Hash which sounds like some kind of marijuana to me, but she insists it's not. I'm just feeling unprepared because the pot heads in my neighborhood are gone and so I'm not sure if I need to bring a bong to the party or not. I'm feeling grossly unprepared. And it dawned on me that I might be scaring some of the girls, most of which I don't even know at all, with my emails. It's ok. At least it kind of prepares them for my inappropriate and sometimes rude comments. It's my version of community service.

4. I'm going to try to do a post tomorrow about news stories. I have a bunch of post it notes scribbled and shoved into my purse and hopefully I can understand what they all mean for you. If not, I'll appear to be crazy and off my medication but that's ok. I'll take it for the team.

5. My favorite thing lately was when Zach Galifianakis was talking about smoking weed on Bill Maher and he was like, "I dont' know why that's allowed on tv but Real Housewives of Atlanta is". LOL! You can see his super hilarious interview on Jimmy Fallon here. And I have to say I'm like stupid excited about seeing the movie Due Date. Like, I can barely contain myself. I love him and I love Robert Downey Jr. (hi-- when is Sherlock Holmes 2 happening???? I WANT IT NOW) so I'm excited.

6. I can't wait to show you the most epic baby present I'm in the process of making. I can't reveal it too soon because it's for one of my readers. And after this I'll probably never be invited to a baby shower ever again. I'm so in tuned to her vagina so it makes it even more awesome.

7. Today I almost ripped my nose piercing out. Yeah- it got stuck on my shirt and it was almost out. So I gently pushed it back in and it hurt like a mother fucker. Clearly it's not healed and I can't change it. After this morning's experience I think I might never change it. And my other problem? I forgot how dry my face gets in the winter and to combat that I'm constantly moisturizing and doing face masks. All of which I have to be gentle around my nose so it looks like only one half of my nose is dry. It's really not cool. I need to find a solution to this and fast.

8. It was colder than shit today and it only reminded me that I hate winter. I hate everything about winter. And then I remembered that I have "try skiing" and then the ice caves on my 30/30 list and I asked myself (out loud) why I'm such a fucking idiot. Like, why am I so stupid and decide I'm going to do something without even taking two seconds for it to sink in that's in the winter and I hate winter and everything about it. I don't enjoy sledding, I hate having to wear multiple layers of clothing, I hate scraping ice and snow off of the windows on my van which I can't even fucking reach because I'm only 5'3. And the whole thing is useless because once you get going and stop, everything from the roof slides onto the front window and then I get angry and start swearing. And then Olivia asks me why I'm yelling at snow and then she repeats what I said. *sigh* Winter doesn't bring out the best of Sara and if I'm already feeling this upset and anxious and we don't even have snow yet? God help you all.

9. Olivia has taken to not flushing the toilet again, and leaving the seat up (come over anytime, it's awesome here) and this morning I caught Stumpy drinking dirty toilet water. It was not what I wanted to see first thing when I woke up.

10. I need to make a part two to my Christmas list. Matt said some of my requests on the first one are unreasonable and never going to happen.

So I'm off my lovelies. I made some pieces to some Christmas cards that are going in my shop...maybe tomorrow?? So I have to start coloring them in. I'm hoping there is a really good show on and I can convince Matt that he should go get me ice cream from Dairy Queen. Even though he's already in his pajamas. If he loves me he will. I'm prepared to lay the guilt down thick.


Danielle said...

I wish I was close enough to come to blog sleepover!!! :( Major sads. I hate the winter as well, you'd think by 24, almost 25, I'd be used to it by now. But I'm not. I absolutely HATE when the roof snow falls on the front window, because then I also have to make a point to swear my head off. The cat in the toilet? Gross. Vomit. Horrible visual. And what's on the Christmas List? Because I'm nosey.

Krysten @ Why Girls Are Weird said...

You totally crack me up and I am seriously ridiculously excited for next weekend. But to be honest if you and Ang are going to start a fight in my living you... well, you can at least take it outside so I don't have to deal with it ;-)

And my parents' dog? Likes to eat the poop out of my cats' litter box? Lots of gross crap going on here too.

Unknown said...

Apparently Mr. O doesn't exist- did you make your blog bestie up??? An imaginary blog bestie...that's a new one! Haha. Actually the link didn't it too late already?

Jon Hanson said...

Ugh.. that is exactly why I have never gotten married. Oh wait.. guys dont have to change their names do they? Huh. Guess I better come up with a new excuse.


Jandy xx said...

i was going to write what Dannielle and what Sarah wrote, damn it!

Unknown said...

Good morning Sara, I noticed you in the comments of Annah's blog and thought I would drop in. You have had me entertained for a while as I've been reading. We share one thing for sure girl and that is hate for winter, ice and cold. Winters here in eastern NC are not really that bad anymore and we do have one of those car port thingys that two cars can get under so we usually don't have to worry about scraping ice. Congrats on the weight loss and you are looking hot girl. you have some really adorable children especially all cute in their costumes. Have an awesome weekend and I'll catch up with you again later. Stop in at my blog if you have the time at.

Anonymous said...

I don't so winter either, that is why I never plan on leaving the South. The coldest it gets here is like 40.

Which is fine to me because I love to wear scarves and gloves and I just bought a uber sexy pair of over the knee suede black boots and am super psyched about getting to wear those bitches.

Fuck yeah.

Just Plain Tired said...

Wow, with all the depressing things listed here, I could probably come up with the bail money, if needed. I'm thoughtful like that, natch. ;)

Mama Mary said...

My Lily is into the no-flushing, leaving toilet lid up thing too. Thank the lawd I don't have animals because I can tell ya I would never recover from that. Never.

Helena said...

YES. To all of this. Except the nose ripping part. And the being in tune with your friends vagina.

(I love your posts)

Jean Has Been Shopping said...

I asked Mr. O to stay, for what it's worth.

AmberLaShell said...

I want to see Due date too! I think Zach LongLastName is so funny! Also, I have always wanted to get my nose pierced but I have been too chicken shit.

Also, I came to tell you that you have an award at my blog, but you have already gotten it, damn! LOL

Ang said...

Thanks for not putting me on blast about cheesecake! It should be an interesting time; i see you hiding out in a random closet about 10 minutes into the thing because you feel bad for scaring the other girls off... HA! As if you'd hide for scaring people away.

Another David said...

Why is it so damn hard to change your name on PayPal?? They don't just have a little "edit profile" button??