Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Wanna feel super stupid?

Forget "Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader". Just forget it. Instead, let's play "Can You Do Kindergarten Homework". It sounds easy.

First, think back to your days in Kindergarten. What did you do? You took a nap. Maybe you were only there half day. For sure you colored. Maybe you played blocks. If you were lucky maybe you got to see a girl's underpants on the playground.

Erase all of that and let's talk about Kindergarten now. The shit is hardcore, folks. We have things like "alphafriends" and "math mountains" and shockingly, homework. Oh, you heard me. We have homework. Now, I didn't mind the homework because over the course of the week Olivia got a packet of worksheets and it was easy stuff. Circling the like pictures representing a number, dot to dot things, practicing writing her numbers, etc. That kind of thing is up my alley and more my speed.

Today though, she came with a "Math Resource Folder" and not gonna lie- I kind of panicked. I've mentioned this before but my math skills are not awesome. I can't do math in my head at all practically and the fact I can balance a checkbook is a minor miracle. I was more of a English/grammar/spelling girl myself, with a sprinkle of science and history. My brother got all of the math smarts in our family and that was fine. Until now.

Inside of the folder are "homework guides" which tell me nothing, a brochure about the math curriculum that they are using and this worksheet packet that I stared at with a "what the fuck" face because I am confused. Really? Is this how they are teaching kids to add now?? Here are some examples of the "guides" that are supposed to help me help Olivia with her upcoming homework. And the terminology they are using.
 All of the arrows, boxes and triangles remind me of Geometry. Which everyone knows I passed with a D+. The fact that my parents praised my first (and only) D+ tells you how terrible in math I really am.
OK. So I'm kind of scared. Even Matt, who likes numbers and things, was wondering what the frack this all is. I hope we don't ruin our kid during Kindergarten. That would be kind of bad.

In other news, Olivia is a student council representative. Um, what? They have that for Kindergarten? She pretty much thinks she's hot shit at this point and told me she has to go to meetings and stuff, but said it in a way like, "Oh- I just can't be bothered to fit yet another thing on my schedule." It was kind of adorable and hilarious at the same time.
So I am pretty stinking proud of my little peanut. She is doing so much better in Kindergarten than I thought she would. I knew she was smart and would do her work, follow directions, etc but I thought maybe she'd have a tough time making friends.

Which brings us to Girl Scouts. I really want to get her into something fun where she's going to learn something and maybe have some positive experiences outside of school. We got a flyer about Girl Scouts a few weeks ago and for $12 I figured hey- we can afford that.

So Monday was the "informational meeting" which was hands down, the most disorganized thing I have ever been to. Ever. It was basically a parent free for all with "leaders" who can't answer any of your questions and they tell you up front they have no troop for you but hey- wanna be the leader? So I left there feeling like maybe I'll get suckered into being a troop leader? We'll see in a few days when they contact parents. It's not that I don't want to be a leader, it's just that I don't have a lot of time. I'm already pretty strapped for time as it is and I feel like maybe I'm taking on too much. But if no other parent steps up we have two choices: go to the generic troop that meets in a not so great part of town and those kids would eat mine alive or she is a "juliette" which basically means she is her own troop. Which I think is ridiculous because it seems like it defeats the point of Girl Scouts? I don't know. But I do know I am not going to worry about it until I hear back.

In the meantime, I am going over the papers I got myself off of the table and um, $50 for a vest and her book? Shit. I think this is going to end up being more expensive than I thought. I haven't even told Matt about that.

So. That's what is new in my world as a parent of a school age child. I have to be honest- I am feeling a little overwhelmed. I am a pretty organized and with it mom regularly and if I'm feeling this way I can't help but feel other parents are too and maybe more. Matt flat out told me he can't handle coming home from work and doing homework with her, he just can't. My typical days is drop Olivia at school, drop Jack at my mom's, go to work, pick up Jack, pick up Olivia, run errands, go home, cook, help with homework while cooking, cleaning, go through school folder, answer emails/phone calls/texts, eat dinner with family, do bath time, do bed time, read stories, laundry, cleaning, etc. Seriously. Everything that happens after I get home is generally a three hour window of time and I'm losing it. Tomorrow's schedule??

7 am: Wake up
8 am: Have myself and both kids ready and eating breakfast
8:15am: Start putting shoes, jackets, etc on.
8:40: Olivia at school
8:45: Jackson at Grandma's
9-1: work
1:15: meeting with PTO president
2:45 pick up Olivia from school
3:30 dentist appointment in town about 30 minutes away (Olivia)
4: my dentist appointment
4:45: hopefully be home by now
5: do school folder, make icing for cake class, pack supplies
5:30: make sure I have supper done for Matt & kids, leave for cake class
8:30: come home from cake class, clean my stuff and kitchen
8:45-??: laundry, return emails/calls/texts, blog post, sort out mail, get Olivia's lunch ready, get school clothes ready for Friday's field trip, etc.

That is ONE DAY folks and pretty much every day of my life is like this.



Priyanka said...

w-o-w! and I thought I am busy!
lol, way to go supermom!! :)

Dick Clark and Boingo Present: said...

So.. they're teaching kindergartners algebra. Pretty much. 5+x=7? Because really the box equals x. And the terminology there is just stupid and makes no sense at all.
Holy crap. I can't even begin to imagine what my children will have to go in the future when I indeed have children. The school system seems to be going batty.
Your schedule sounds so stressful.. Go SuperMom!

Best wishes.

Shirley said...

Do they do Saxon math or do they use the Everyday Mathematics curriculum?

Unknown said...

you're totally going to end up being a scout leader, and your troop will be ridiculously awesome. i think it's great that you're involving her in stuff.

you can always put her in sports if scouts doesn't work out. soccer/tball/basketball. when it's warmer for some of those.

i was an "over involved" kid. BUT i have mad social skills, where the hubs was not socialized very well and is shy as all get out.

Josie said...

NO! That's how they teach math in MEXICO. I tutored English as a Second Language students and all of my kids that came straight from Mexico did their math like that and I was SO confused!

Jo-Anne's Ramblings said...

Yeah I can so relate to such a busy day I have had them and will have them again and I am now a nanna so now I have mummy jobs and nanna jobs and wife jobs and just Jo jobs or and daughter jobs.......

I think kindergarten is getting harder I do not know how much homework my grandson gets but he does get I was never into making my kids do homework but that was because a lot of the time I didn't understand what they were doing and was unable to help much......

Dana said...

You're whole post gave me a headache. I knew there was a reason I don't want to have kids! :)

middle child said...

You make me dizzy, you know that? If you were mine I would put you in a 5 year time out - strictly for your benefit. 'Course knowing you, you'd probably refinish the chair you were sitting on, clean the carpet beneath it-later tearing off the carpet to reveal hardwood floors which you would then re-finish, wallpaper the wall behind you, carve in a bookcase and have daily meetings with all your imaginary friends (for which there will be a waiting list.) will have written 976 novels. So...never mind. Just carry on.

Anonymous said...

Ok, I actually understand those math sheets, but for KINDERGARTEN!?!?!?!?!?!? what the eff yo? What happened to plain 'ol 2+2=4?? Cripes.

Well good luck! That is certainly a lot to handle. But that's why you're coming for a girls wknd and we're gonna have a blast and you can relax! :)

Julie H said...

Yep, sounds about like our days. It's pretty mellow right now with no one doing sports :)

I was a GS leader for years and years. It's fun when they are little but I didn't like it so much when they got older and were supposed to actually do something besides crafts. The worst part is the weird parents you get sometimes. Usually they will have some kind of waiting list for new troops. Daisies is always the largest troops.

Julie H said...

Oh I forgot about the math!! I hate that crap! Why can't they teach them to count on their fingers like we did lol. I just tell them to go talk to their dad. Well I used to, now I tell them to go talk to Jess, she's farther than any of us ever were.

Ang said...

The math homework looks ridiculous! It's Kindergarten for fucks sake!

Steff said...

Ok so get this shit. My coworker is a single mom and has a 7 year old daughter. She decided to enroll her daughter in Girl Scouts and took her to her first meeting. Well, the leader was a guy, weird right? So she asked me if I thought it was weird, and I agreed with her but told her she had nothing to worry about.

The next day she tells me she did a background check on the guy (Free online...the site is awesome!) and he is a CONVICTED FELON. The day before the meeting he actually had a court date because he impersonated an officer, stole someone's identity, battery and assault...the list was 5 or 6 pending convictions long and he had 2 or 3 prior felony convictions. My coworker made a big stink of it and called the school and Girl Scouts of America to let them know about it and they said they do background checks on people and they don't know how they missed this guy. What the fuck?! And she of course had to do it completely anonymously because this guy had ALL her information and knows she's a single mom! God, how creepy is that? Not to convince you to be the troop leader or anything....hahah

Ruth said...

The stuff they make little kids learn is just Ohmygod! They do everything so different from how I learned. Once I asked one of Kiddo's teachers about the tables in math and she looked at me like I was a weirdo. Kiddo had 100 site words she had to know too. Not sure if Olivia will but Kiddo had that in kindergarten. I thought it was odd it was spelled site not sight if you were supposed to recognize them by sight, but what do I know?
Feel good, you can help her now. My kid is in physical science and I don't know what the hell is going on.
Student council? Sounds strange. But, good for her.

ComfyMom~Stacey said...

Why are they complicating addition with 'partners' and 'mountains'. 2+5=7 and 5+2=7. Enough said.

Dh got roped into being cub scout pack leader 2 years running. most miserable job ever! He got no help at all from other pack parents, but was criticized for the way he did things. Like when he asked when would be a good day for a meeting no one responded, so he picked a time good for him & a bunch of them were suddenly all "Well that time SUCKS'

Don't do it. It'll eat your soul

Amy said...

Welcome to the crazy life of school age kids. I'm on my last one who is now 15 and almost ready to drive. I'll be so glad when I can stop running her everywhere. She plays travel soccer and goes to physical therapy which means I run her somewhere 4-5 days a week. At one point in time, I was doing it with 3 kids. Homework? My kid can barely carry her book bag because it's so heavy. I feel for ya! Oh yeah, you forgot to pick up Jackson (in your itinerary). It's understandable. Just breathe ...