Thursday, June 28, 2012

Lillian is going bat shit crazy.

Before I forget, let's do the winners for the two book giveaways I have ending this week:

Brand New Human Being: Kathy!
A Lighter Shade of Gray: Patricia Crowley!

I will try to email you both, but feel free to contact me first if you see this! Email me at: sarastrand9438(at)hotmail(dot)com.

So I was going to post about day 2 of Nebraska but events from today have made me put that off until tomorrow. Folks, Lillian has gone fucking CRAZY. I have admittedly done nothing in order to get rid of her because I fear I will look bat shit crazy trying to explain to "experts" what my problem is. Matt says he does not trust that I will do the sage thing or the entrance cleaning thing right and I will in fact, fuck it all up worse. Which I can't blame him, because I'm just not good with things that have a lot of steps and requirements. It's just not a skill I have, bitches.

But the main thing we experience with Lil is the lights flashing in the cubby hole. Which honestly? Isn't so bad now that we're used to it. She's OK during True Blood and that's what's important here. She doesn't like my VH1 reality shows and starts going all blinky and if any of us suffered from seizures, we would be doing it non stop. We've gotten used to it and when she gets bad if we say, "Stop it, Lillian!", it usually stops for the night.

Well, today? She has moved out of the cubby. She has started fucking with lights. Like, actual lights. The light in the stairway only flips on when she wants it to. Or she'll start doing her spazzy blinking on the stairs. The cats hiss at nothing when I come down the stairs on my way to bed. She is starting to blink in my scrapbook closet. Even now the kids are freaking out about the lights. Last night I was wide awake in bed because something felt... off. So I kind of get out of bed and immediately almost pissed myself because the living room LIT UP and you know me, I ran back into bed (I jumped a good three feet, not joking) and seriously thought I was going to die.

If you know me at all, you know the one thing I cannot handle is scary stuff. Scary movies, Halloween, haunted tours, etc. The irony here is that I am now living it. To fully appreciate my full wussy-ness, please know that I have never seen the movie Scream all the way through. I skipped through everything and only did that much because I really was in love with Skeet Ulrich. I am scared of the dark, I am scared of Mormons and priests, I'm scared of most dogs and I'm scared of bugs. The fact that I am having to deal with this is freaking me out to no end.

I need to figure out what the hell I'm going to do about this because this sucks.

So if you never hear from me again, assume I have fallen victim to a horror movie in my own house.


Carrie said...

Ok. So I seriously could've written this post. Remember when that old lady was standing next to my bed!?!?! And now I literally think my dog that died three years ago is back. Oh, and I hear people walking on the carpet. All. Night. Long. Seriously, I'm losing my shit.

On another note, I miss you boo! Sorry about the "boo" thing. I just got done watching this weeks episode of Love and Hip Hop Atlanta. Um. Addicted.

And I probably wouldn't miss you if I'd, I don't know, emailed you? Can you say lazy!!! Or horrible friend. No, let's go with lazy.

Ruth said...

I think I'd have to move.
I have a ghost that freaks out my cat sometimes and likes to play with electronics, but not to that extent.
It did set off one of Kiddo's talking toys one night and another time turned on the Christmas porch lights.
Maybe you need to call one of those shows like " Paranormal" or whatever.

Ryan Adair said...

Ask the Lilian to leave. Tell her that she has greater things waiting for her on the other side and not to be afraid. Tell her that you will take good care of her house, but she can not stay any longer because she is scaring the children. She doesn't seem like an "evil" spirit, just stuck. I'd reckon she had some kind of dimensia before dying and didn't realize that 'going home' meant passing onto the next life.

Shannon @ Bungalow960 said...

I would talk to her. I would be like look, I get that you live here too, but can you knock it off? Thanks.

Life Love & High Heels said...


Life Love & High Heels said...


RandomRambler said...

I still say call the Ghost Hunters. Their main goal is to help. And they won't think you're crazy. Seriously.

Julie H said...

eeekkk Call a church and see if they have someone that can clean the house.

Jes said...

I agree with Ryan. Tell her that this is your house now and she needs to leave.