Tuesday, October 2, 2012

Laundry room update: DIY gone bad.

Honestly, if this were anyone else's house it would be funny but because it's mine it's just sad and tragic. Yes, we are STILL trying to get this mother fucking laundry room done and every step forward is really seven steps backwards. And lots of swears.

For you newbies out there, please go here to see what the laundry room started out as.

One of the biggest problem with the laundry room, aside from the ghetto sink, is the door. Our laundry room is right off of the kitchen and off of the laundry room is a really hideous, purple, uninsulated back porch. In the winter it gets so cold in there that the actual back door stops functioning. (Matt assures me he is pretty sure he fixed that but time will tell.) In order to save ourselves from hypothermia the door between the laundry room and the back porch needs to be an exterior door. Which, no big deal.

I once again sprung money on Matt during a Home Depot trip and he was again, not impressed. Especially as he's trying to fit an exterior door into my mini van on what had been so far, the coldest day of the fall and it was super windy. It also probably didn't help that both kids were crabby, I had to pee, and we're all telling him to hurry the fuck up, we're hungry.

He's a good sport. He sure is.


You can imagine that he was equally impressed when I told him that YAY, you can install that bitch today. The thing with Matt is that you have to almost be really mean and yell at him to get the project done RIGHT AWAY otherwise it'll sit in the garage and he'll likely burn it in a bonfire and then think maybe it wasn't a good idea. (You laugh, but any one of my friend can tell you about the time he randomly burned our fence. True story.)

So Matt started taking down the old door. Easy peasy. Only to realize that the door? Was never actually installed. And by that, I mean that it was screwed into short pieces of random cut wood, and the wood was just kind of there.

Which completely explains why the door never functioned properly and you sometimes thought the wall was going to come down when you opened the door. Because the wall actually COULD have come down when you opened the door.

Lots of swears started happening and then Matt made his first run of the day back to Menards to obviously get more wood. Apparently, he would have to rebuild the entire wall.

Guess what Matt really hates doing? Building and repairing walls. Only because he hates drywall and sanding and painting and building a wall leads to that.
 So this is door removed. You see above the door how there is literally no support above it so the door doesn't bow over time?
This is the door and frame gone. See? No bracing above the door, nothing to the side, nothing. Matt was not happy.

So lots of swearing, measuring, cutting and bracing the door and making sure it's level, and it's installed.
Of course, the deadbolt set we bought had an issue. We had it keyed to match our other house keys but when Matt started putting it in (at 7:30 p.m.- keep in mind this project started around 1 p.m.) he noticed the screws and the switch plate were gone. So poor Matt had to race to Home Depot before they closed and then all was right in the world.

But the best part is while Matt is bitching about how everything in our house was done so fucking half assed and horrible I came along and reminded him that HE was the one who wanted a fixer upper. HE wanted to make it ours and do all this home improvement stuff so really? He's living his dream right now.

I was almost killed with a power tool at that moment. You see, when Matt's stressed and pissed off he does not appreciate my witty humor. It just makes him more angry but makes me laugh.

So obviously, I win.

But that was like two weeks ago now and I don't think I need to even tell you that the drywall hasn't gone up yet but he assures me he has everything he needs. I also don't think I need to tell you I don't believe him.

The moral of the story folks is that if you don't know how to install a door? Don't do it yourself. Because the next homeowner will wish he had your current address so he could beat the hell out of you.


Jennifer Kay said...

By the time you are done with all these projects you will have the house you always dreamed of and then realize you can probably get good money out of it and before you know it, a for sale sign is in the front yard.

middle child said...

Yeah. You kinda did pick a bad time to throw your wit at Matt.
I have decided to steal your word Ghetto in describing every room in my house but don't get pissed. I mentioned on my post that it was your word. If I knew how to link...I would have done so. Kisses.

Anonymous said...

Girlfriend, you would think we married the same dude. I have to do the same thing with Joshua....it is like pulling teeth to get him to do shit around here, when HE was the one that was like "Oh no, dn't hire anyone to fix shit because I can do it."

Yeah, right.

I mean, he TOTALLY can do it, but getting him to do it is just a pain in the asshole.

Shannon @ Bungalow960 said...

Dudeeee. Replacing the entire door frame sucks. We had to to it too. The previous owners just kept using longer and longer screws to keep the door on. Then it all ripped apart. Assholes.

Ang said...

At lest things are getting done right. I'm learning quickly how house projects are not as simple as 'fix this now' and then it's fixed. I know you already know this though. Let me just restate: at least things are getting done the RIGHT way!

Ashley said...

We still aren't finished our bathroom that we started in February. There is no doubt in my mind that it will still not be finished by this coming February.

I feel your pain.

Unknown said...

We feel your pain over here. Craig has spent many, many Saturday afternoons cursing the previous owners. We had an electrician in to do a little work (the previous owners rewired the house)and when he opened one of the panels, he said "This is a damn mess, your smoke detectors work, right?" Awesome.

Julie H said...

so so like our house!! Scott cusses the man that built it every time we have to do anything.

ComfyMom~Stacey said...

He's living his dream right now.

I am so going to have use that line on DH the next time a small fix becomes a big one because he so wanted a fixer upper as well.