Vampires, Birds or Mosquitos? Hard to tell.

So tonight is all about Tahquamenon Falls and how we almost died of blood loss. 'Tis true friends.

On Friday evening we ended up driving to the lower Tahquamenon Falls because there is some driving distance between lower/upper and yeah. It just made sense. It was kind of drizzling but not bad and I told the group that if it was raining, I was OK with running to get my picture and running back to the vehicle. I wasn't about to make people get pneumonia and shit.

So while the rain wasn't an issue the mother effer mosquitoes were. Seriously. They were after us. Mostly Jon though. But they were sucking us dry, they were big enough that you could see the stripes on their ass and they made whizzing noises by your ear.  Seriously. They were out of control.

 Lower Falls... pretty, huh? You'll notice Matt and I here are hoods up. We snapped and we hustled. Those mosquitoes were no joke folks.

 On Saturday we woke up to pouring rain and even colder temperatures. BUT we braved it. This time we all remembered to bring our bug spray. And we all suckered up and bought ponchos which looked exactly like white Hefty bags, yall. So here's the upper falls:

 Matt and I modeling the Spring 2011 Hefty collection. I sprayed us down, then the freaking bags down with bug spray. I also inhaled/ate some bug spray. I don't suggest it... it tastes terrible.

 Some super nice hard core hiker guys (who didn't have ponchos on) took out group picture. You'll notice that Jennifer and I had our hands into our sweatshirts.

 It was also fun because there was a sign that said "94 Steps to Brink". Um, no joke yo. Again, it was only 94 steps one way and by the time I got back to the top I felt like I did enough stairs for awhile. But it was worth it.

These falls are absolutely beautiful. I have such a love of waterfalls. Some day I'd like to swim under one. That seams like that would be kind of awesome, right?

So I've crossed yet another thing off my 30/30 list. Woo! I am really glad that I drove the distance to see these because they were beautiful. Plus I would really like to take up hiking with legit gear and stuff. It would have been fun to go into the woods but yeah. We weren't prepared for the bug overload.

Tomorrow is Dear Sara-- send your questions to: sarastrand9438(at)hotmail(dot)com bitches! :)

Boats and Bears

So here's part two of my Michigan trip from last weekend.

Saturday we headed out to the falls again (that will be it's own post) and then afterwards we went to Whitefish Point, which ended up being the same thing as the Great Lakes Shipwreck Museum because the road ended there. But the museum sounded cool because one thing the Great Lakes are known for is the unpredictable weather, which makes guiding a boat through there fairly treacherous.

The place had so much to really take in but I can say I learned a lot. One cool thing was in one of the boat houses they had a Coast Guard boat that they would paddle out into the lake to help stranded ship men. The boat was gorgeous, but trying to put into perspective how difficult it would be to get that boat out there in inclement weather was kind of awesome. Then if they couldn't get out to sea, they had this thing they'd pull/push on the beach as close as they could. Then they'd use a canon ball to shoot out this wooden paddle with instructions (one side in English, one in French) on how to secure the rope to yourself so they could pull you in. It was pretty amazing.

Anyways. We convinced the boys to pay an extra $4 per person so we could climb up into this lighthouse and see the view. I feel like it was worth it just for the work out factor. The lady told us it was 54 steps. First off, it was 57 steps, only after the 20 to to get up to the base of the lighthouse. Also? That didn't count having to come back down. Also? It didn't take into consideration how incredibly narrow and steep these stairs were. Going up was only mildly awkward because your face was directly behind some one's ass. Mine was behind Matt which wasn't a super thing because he was having some issues from  his BK Angry Burger the day before. Have I mentioned this is only stale air in there? Well the view at the top was gorgeous. Tight fit but it was really pretty.

Coming back down was a different story. You can kind of see how steep the stairs are in this picture. But they are steep. I can't mention this enough. The stairs are obviously a spiral stair case, so you have to go backwards for awhile and then turn yourself around. Plus, it was raining so the stairs were slippery. So I pretty much felt like I was going to slip and fall the entire time.

 But here's us at the top. And there's a big raindrop on the lens.. oh well.

 Also you could tour the Lightkeeper's House which they've restored and the entire place was full of antiques and information. It was also full of completely creepy wax people. Seriously. I can't stress how creepy and life like they were. But in the kitchen Jennifer wanted me to give Grandma some love. Which I could do as soon as the old people (who smelled like they shit their pants, I'm not even kidding) left. So over the barrier I went, quick boob grab (it was firm) and back out I went.

Then we went into the shipwreck artifact building. SUPER interesting. They had information and recovered artifacts from several Great Lakes shipwrecks and really- it was so interesting to hear how some ships went down. A lot of boats run into each other apparently.

 Isn't this gorgeous? It's a light that would go inside of a lighthouse. It's pretty stunning in person. And huge.

 After the museum Jennifer and I talked the guys into taking us to the Oswalds Bear Ranch. Basically we wanted to have our picture taken with baby bears like in the brochure. So we drive (really far out of our way- so thanks for being a trooper, Jon!) and end up there by mid afternoon. We find out it costs $15 per vehicle, so no big. Then we see this sign:

 So again, Jon being awesome forks over $5. And I make a new friend.

 Matt kept telling us that they were going to smell and be rough and no. He's a fucking liar. They smelled like mud but hello- they have a mud bottom home. But they weren't rough, they were kind of soft. So then he backtracks and says it's adult bears. Yeah. Well, that's yet to be determined. But this bear was super friendly and he likes suckers and Fruit Loops. Seriously. He could absolutely live with me and fit in with my kids.

The fun part was when we got there, the guy who apparently runs the place was going to just let Jennifer and I in. Well out of NOWHERE this punk asshole kid comes up and is like "Five bucks and a camera". Like a god damn Bear Nazi. Seriously. But whatever. We were already in so we were doing it.

Afterwards we walked around to see the adult bears (male and females were separated). This was me feeding a yearling some flowers. They like eating flowers too. They also have large tongues.

 Then Matt posed for a picture with Jennifer. I couldn't get anything out of him yet he will do it for her. Nice.

Overall... it was a fun day. I was pretty tired by the time we got back for sure. :)

Tomorrow... I'm going to post about the waterfalls for you. Then Friday will be Dear Sara (send questions to sarastrand9438(at)hotmail(dot)com!!), and then Saturday I'm going to do my final post on Michigan. Next week though.. we're talking about the contest that will be happening and we're going to talk about marriage. Because I got a bit of a post request I guess I could call it? So stay tuned.

Open road, boats, bad food = Day One, Michigan

Most of you who pay attention to my blog entries know that this previous weekend Matt and I went to Michigan as a 7 year anniversary/meet blogger friend/cross some shit off of Sara's 30/30 list. And some of you might ask, "Hey Sar- is Matt sick of your list?" Why, yes. Yes he is.

But he troops through it because I'm large and in charge. Well, I think we're probably the same weight, he's taller, but I do dictate what we do. Mostly because if it were up to him, we'd never leave the couch because we'd be watching a continuous loop of Antiques Roadshow. So you can see what my role in this family is.

Anyways. So for the last year or so I've been making friends with Jennifer from Just Hides The Dishes In The Dryer and one day.. we decided to meet up. Having gone on a few blogger meetups before I felt OK with meeting someone. Even though I'd be staying in the same hotel with them in the middle of nowhere. I felt pretty OK that her and her husband wouldn't kidnap me and sacrifice my body. Mostly because we were staying in Paradise, Michigan and who wants to fuck up a town like that when their name is Paradise? Anyways.

So on Friday morning Matt and I left Superior at like 4:30 in the morning. I'm not even kidding. I didn't fall asleep until after midnight because I was busy getting stuff done so we could just get up and go. Our first destination was actually Sault Ste. Marie where we would all meet up and then get on a boat tour of the Soo Locks. If you don't know what the Soo Locks are (which is OK because Jennifer and I still don't really get it), they are pretty much like gates between the different Great Lakes. This one is specifically the gate between Lake Superior and Lake Michigan. The "locks" is like a tunnel in which incoming/outgoing boats sit in while they raise or lower the water to match whatever water level the lake they are trying to enter into. The cool thing about this is that we would actually be entering into Canada once we went through the locks so officially--- "travel internationally" is off my list. I was completely in Canada. Canadians waved at me- it's official.

Anyways. So here is Matt and I on the boat:

 This is the world's largest horizontal hydro plant? I believe that's what they said. But it was built by Italians who were first to develop the area. What we liked about the building is that Italians are apparently really great at masonry, and so all along this massive building are lighthouses made of brick. It was really a pretty building.

Here is me and Matt in Canada. I swear that is a Canadian flag in the background. Despite the fact it was windy, it refused to cooperate.

 Jennifer and I before entering into the locks. She is as awesome and fun and spunky as she is on her blog. I had no doubt we'd get along but I was pleasantly surprised. I told Matt at the end of the trip it felt like her and Jon were old friends. I love these people.

 OK, so here is the lock. Well, the Canada entry one. Notice how low the water is right now? And you see the line on the red gates towards the top? That's how high the water has to be in order for us to get into Lake Superior.

Consequently, when we came back into the locks, they had to drain the water back to this level so we could get into Lake Michigan. It's about a 15 minute process each way and it's kind of a cool thing to be on the boat while the water goes up and down.

After our Soo Lock tour, we headed back to Paradise to check into our hotel. Across the parking lot of our hotel was the Red Flannel Saloon or some shit. Um, this place is kind of hick? I mean, it's pretty... well let's just say the health department probably didn't get to those parts much and the owners really like baskets. Like, baskets were everywhere. The service was spotty, the food wasn't great, but the best part?

Your drink came in a mason jar. Honestly- I thought this was just a southern thing? And while I've drank out of a mason jar before it was just bizarre to be doing so in the U.P. of Michigan. Can I also say that our food was really expensive? My burger tasted weird, I highly doubt that was cow I was eating.

After paying for our food we headed up to the lower Tahquamenon Falls. Which is the "see a new waterfall" portion of my 30/30 list. I'll do an entire post on just the falls because I have too many pictures of it and I think you'll like my little post of that. ;)

But tomorrow.. I'll tell you about the rest of our trip. AND... stay tuned because I have a contest in the works. It's going to be gloriously disgusting yet awesome. And so me.

In the mean time, send me your questions for Dear Sara Friday to sarastrand9438(at)hotmail(dot)com. Remember, no questions = no post. Get them to me by Thursday evening to be included.

And as a final note, check out my blog post for The Note Project HERE. I hope you like that, I'm excited as hell to be included in it, and I hope you participate in your own note of appreciation.

Sunday was a FUN day

So despite the fact that my Sunday began on a shitty note about Lenny, I didn't want to go home. I had driven through a god damn snow storm for this blog meetup so it was going to happen even if it ended up being just me and Krysten. Thankfully... Anna and Amy joined us. And because they blog anonymously I won't link up. Anyways. They were so awesome, cute and nice. The four of us had a super fun time at the Mall of America.

Krysten and I had talked on Saturday how we both want to get red lipstick. We have tons of other shades but we've never gotten a good red. And every self respecting girl needs a red lip once in awhile. We ended up stopping in Sephora and we got this lady who was overly eager about makeup. Which I suppose is good...she's probably on commission. Anyways. She puts a different shade of red on each of us. The experience of having someone else put makeup on you is weird. Amy wanted foundation and the lady wanted to take all of her makeup off. Which hello--- no girl is going to let you do that. Jesus. While she was inching away from sales lady pushing the $60 spray foundation, Krysten and I snuck a picture. Which is APPARENTLY a huge no-no inside the store. Nobody told us why and I think it's a bit ridiculous. So check us out in our illegal, hooker-lipped glory:

We ended up not buying lipstick because Dior lipstick is $30 for a half tube. Which is insane. I'm sure there is more expensive out there, but neither of us have that kind of money laying around for lipstick.

So we moved onto other stores. An alarming trend we noticed was that almost every store had what I'm going to refer as Russian Chic. Like this hat and the matching mittens? All I need is a long coat and those hideous boots behind me and I'm set as a Russian hooker. Well I'll need the $30 lipstick but I feel I can pretty much pull the look off. I don't think I have to tell you that I basically felt like I had a dead animal on my head. Gross feeling.

 Well then we went into Ragstock and found, what I consider, to be the motherload of awesome hats. This my dear lambwhores? Is a hat meant to look like an elephant. Because when you think winter you automatically picture an elephant.

But we pretty much all agreed that it looks like a small but chubby penis and some unfortunately spaced balls.

Anna had to leave us early so she missed my elephant hat shenanigans. :( Sad day. After walking the entire mall a few times we decided to part ways since Krysten had a work meeting and I had to drive back to Superior. So we snapped a quickie picture:

 Amy, Krysten and Me

It was a fun afternoon. We've talked about doing this monthly after the holidays and I think that would be super fun. We'll have to rotate or something because it's a bit of gas for me, but it is still fun. And these girls were super fun to shop with. But I'm convinced our next gathering NEEDS to be a sex toy party because that is hilarious and fun. And awesome. And could you just imagine the pictures? Girls-- it needs to happen. :)

Lenny & Weekend Part One

So because some of you aren't on Facebook and have emailed me about Lenny-- he's officially passed away. I am incredibly angry with the Superior Animal Hospital that I can barely put it into words. First off, they never told us last week that once a cat gets urinary blockage that it basically will come back again and again. And the vet tried talking us into spending another $1100 to "maybe" fix it. Among other things I'm too angry to talk about, I almost hit that bitch. Thank god I had Matt with me because I could be in jail as we speak. Anyways. We made the decision yesterday and I think Lenny knew. We brought him in and after being kind of rude and insensitive to us, they get an IV in him for the euthanasia. He kept rubbing up against us and meowing and it was breaking out hearts. Literally seconds before they do it they asked if we've already paid and we told them to add it to the fucking bill. Lenny looked at me, meowed in a very sad way, and then he was gone. It was only seconds but it was awful. They let us hang out with him for a little while and by the time they took him I had cried so much he was soaking wet. They checked him out and Matt is going to bury him under our apple tree this evening. My face is super red and hurts from crying and blowing my nose so much. So now, I have no Lenny AND I'm stuck with a $1200 bill because hey! We have to pay to put him down. And to as soon as I saw his bowl & humping blanket when I got home? Totally lost it. I can't even tell you how heavy my heart is right now. So let's all take a moment and say goodbye to Lenny. (Thanks to a lovely lambwhore that made this for me!)

 *sigh*

OK. So I promised I would make an effort with a post so I'm going to write about part of my weekend. The other part (and funny pictures) will come tomorrow.

Saturday I drove down to River Falls to see Krysten and start the blog get-together weekend. Because I am an idiot I decided that I would take a risk and drive in a snowstorm. The fact that it took me an hour to get to Cloquet, which usually takes me 15 minutes, was not a good sign.

 And maybe the fact that it took me 3 hours to get to Hinckley when it's only an hour away was an even worse sign. Seriously. This picture? Is the only  time I could see the road and the car ahead of me. On a highway where it's 70mph max and 40mph min, I was doing 30. At one point we hit 20mph and the most I ever did was 40mph. And even that was iffy. It cannot be said I'm not a good friend, that's for damn sure.

 But once I got there, I got to see Krysten's new house which is amazing and I'm jealous of her fireplace. And that she has a guest bedroom. And her dog, Monte. And her cat, Molly. I can't say much for Metro because he hates women and that he's huge...but Monte and Molly liked me. And I liked the fact her dog humps her cat. I couldn't get a picture but someday I will. It was hilarious.

When I was there I watched Harry Potter movies 3 and 4 (guess what, Krysten?? We have movies 1-5. Who knew?? I didn't and I fucking live here! So I'm watching #5 tonight!) because I can't be her friend if I'm not up to speed on all things Potter. I'm working on it.

We ate junk food, talked about life and watched movies. It was a good night. Sunday we went to the Mall of America.. more on that tomorrow.

But here's a picture of Krysten and I holding Monte. The one with Monte licking my tongue was too blurry which is sad. And do you love how we are color coordinated without planning? I totally do.

The time Matt almost killed my kids. With witnesses.

Maybe I should have named this post "First Ever MN/WI Blogger Meetup" but whatever. I kind of think my title is more catchy.

So Krysten is awesome and arranged for only the super cool people who blog in MN/WI to get together and wow everyone with our awesomeness. (Did you not get the invite?? Yikes. That *might* mean you aren't cool. Check into that.) We were going to meet at Como Zoo yesterday and five of us did. Actually- a sixth was supposed to come but after checking with Krysten and then Krysten never hearing from her again we've concluded that:

A. She gave up trying to find parking.
B. She found a parking spot, found us, and was scared by our awesomeness.
C. She was abducted and murdered somewhere in the picnic area.

To our credit, Krysten and I totally looked at bushes to see if we saw feet sticking out afterwards. We saw nothing, so let's hope she just chickened out. Otherwise I might feel bad.

Anyways. So the zoo was fun. I brought my kids and Matt because we got once a year and I figured I'd be all multi-tasker and bring them and get the trip out of the way. So smart I am.

This isn't Matt or my kids. It's me and Krysten burning our armpits on the monkey thingie. The monkey exhibit smells. FYI.

I bought the kids snowcones because I rock like that and I told them, "Absolutely do not drop these because I am not buying another one." Thankfully- my kids follow directions. When we get to the exhibit where the lions and big furry things are I see that there are stairs. I tell Matt (who's pushing the double stroller), "Dude-there's stairs." And he gives me the look that means he will do what he wants because he thinks he's right and says, "So what." Um- so he makes it down two, maybe, when I hear Olivia scream and see Jackson tumble down the concrete steps. Both snowcones have been lost but dammit if they weren't holding the container they were in. They TRIED to hold them. So obviously Matt forgot to strap the kids into the fucking stroller. I was so mad I seriously would have probably killed him with my water bottle.

(Dear Ladies- you saved a man's life on Sunday and you didn't even know it. FYI.)

Seriously. I can't even believe him sometimes. He does these kinds of things all of the time, and then gets pissed off because I get angry. Ugh. Seriously. Anyways.

So I had to get new snowcones to make up for his suckiness as a parent and then I become the favorite. :)

It was so hot yesterday and while us grown ups were dying the kids did super well and never complained about the heat at all. Most of the animals looked like they were on the verge of death so that kind of sucks. Poor furry animals. :(

But here's us at the very end. We should have taken it at the beginning because we would have looked a million times better. But I think we all lost a little bit of weight from sweat. So, bonus I guess??

It was great to meet all of them and I'm excited for the next one. Which we've decided is going to be in Krysten's pool.

Oh- and I am going to post ten year reunion and senior year of high school stuff tomorrow and Wednesday. Yes- it's a double post. Yes- it will be worth it.