We R Who We R

It feels like forever ago already but at the end of June we joined one of my friends and her pretty amazing daughter and we all went to a Kesha concert. It was outdoors, the weather was perfect, and it was so nice to get away with just Olivia. 

If you've never been to Mystic Lake Casino in Minnesota, they have a huge outdoor amphitheater which was really well maintained so the grounds were super nice. The hotel was really great too and we were surprised at how fast the lines for everything were. 

Anyways, we went for a Kesha concert. 

I had to buy the girls shirts because you can't go to a concert and not buy a shirt. You have to have proof you were there.  

 The show itself was pretty good. The opening act was some guy called CVBZ and he was alright. He wasn't terrible but he wasn't great either and he looked like he needed a shower. He had a couple of songs that I bopped along to but not enough for me to go out of my way to buy them, if that makes sense. 

Then we waited some more for Kesha. 

By the time Kesha came on it was fairly dark but not dark enough that you couldn't see the people around you. If you are in need of interesting people watching, a Kesha concert is where you want to be. Hands down. Nothing can even come close to it. We saw a six foot papermache gold penis, someone was hauling that thing around, which eventually got carried to stage for Kesha to sign. A lot of panties and bras were removed and tossed. A lot of people with much too small clothing on. Some were wearing actual underwear and calling it an outfit. One woman had a "skirt" made of dildos. It was basically a belt with dildos attached and she was calling it a skirt. Poor Olivia had never seen any of this and I had to explain why someone would wear fake penises and what a fake penis was used for. 

So that was fun. 

Her concert was alright. I wish she had played more from her current album but "Praying" was definitely the encore. She attempted to sing Dolly Parton's "Jolene" but no, the only person who has any business covering that is Miley Cyrus, Kesha's version was terrible. I'm going to say it, it was terrible. I also wish Kesha didn't talk so much. You don't actually have to introduce every song, we are capable of figuring out what you're singing, fans definitely don't need to be told. If she hadn't talked so much she could have sang more songs, which is what the people wanted .The other odd thing is that the songs she sang from her back catalog were remixed, or had a new twist to make it just enough different from the original that it wasn't great. Maybe that was some kind of shade to Dr. Luke after the court case, I'm not sure but I wish she had just left them as they were because they were great. 

I was pleasantly surprised that the girl can sing. She can actually sing live and it's so refreshing because so many artists sing to a back track and that's just awful but she is 100% for real singing so that was nice. Tons of outfit changes which weren't needed and there was a totally bizarre/useless interlude that we could have skipped all together. She was clearly changing her outfit and taking a drink but let's maybe stick with two outfits or something. 

Overall? It was good. Olivia and I had a fun time and I'm glad we had a little getaway. It was awesome catching up with my friend and getting to know her daughter. My friend Sarah is someone I knew in high school but got to know better in college and she was the one who organized the GoFundMe when I had Lucy. She's a pretty fantastic person in general and I'm so glad we got to hang out. I legit want to be her when I grow up, that's how great she is. 

Ignoring the sad stuff is not supportive.

You know how when something sad happens, we all are divided between two types of people: people who rush in to say how sorry they are and really, if there is anything I can do.... or the people who say nothing because they don't know what to say or do and just feel awkward and don't want to make the other person feel worse so it's best to just do and say nothing. 

It doesn't matter what the tragedy is, we will always fall into those two categories. 

But once you have firmly placed yourself in a category, it's what you do once you are there that counts. It's lovely to say that you'll help out with whatever, and then conveniently never come back around or worse, are too busy or not available to help when called upon. That's really the worst kind of person to be, really. You may as well put yourself with the do nothing group from the start because then there isn't any disappointment. 

Admittedly, I never really understood what any of this was like until Matt and I had marriage issues, but at the time, I was so young. Our friends were young. And a lot of "friends" weren't really friends at all. I had spent years cultivating good friendships after that, ones that I thought would be really pillars of support for me should anything awful happen again. Because we all need that. We all need a solid support system, be it family or friends. Life is just so much easier knowing you have people ready to rally behind you and hold you up. 

After my miscarriage, I don't think I ever fully verbalized what that did to me on the inside. Sure, I have two great kids already. Sure, I wasn't really sure if I wanted a third and it was sprung on me and I was terrified and worried. But having all of it taken away is really quite cruel. I have had enough time to really think about it, do some research on my own and I really feel like I should have waited another two weeks. I think maybe my pregnancy wasn't as far as they thought and I blindly believed whatever they told me because I hadn't really processed being pregnant in the first place, and now they tell me it's not viable and here is a prescription, you can handle it there and you'll be fine. I really wish I had waited just to see. So then cue the guilt, you know? 

But what I wasn't prepared for was how  unavailable people were. Don't get me wrong, I have friends who were great. I got care packages in the mail, I had people running my kiddos to their activities for a few days, I had friends texting or messaging me to see if I needed anything, how I was holding up. 

There was a large majority however, that did nothing. I got the obligatory "I'm so sorry" and that was it. Each month my period came and I would get a little more upset. I'd cry in the baby section of Target. I'd seize up when I saw a pregnant woman walk by me, happily rubbing her belly no doubt feeling tiny kicks from inside. So many times this summer I reached out to people to ask to go for a walk, go for lunch, just hang out in any way because I needed to feel normal, I needed to talk my emotions out to women who would get it because there are things Matt, as a man, would not understand at all. Mostly, I just wanted to cry and have someone tell me I'm not a terrible mother and it's OK. 

Not once did any of these people follow through. 

And I get it. Life is busy. I'm busy. We're all busy. But I tell you what- if someone called me and said they needed to get out of the house and just let it out? You bet your ass I'm putting whatever I have aside to be that person. Because I know first hand what it takes to be in that place mentally and emotionally, and those are the people who need you the most. 

So again, we learn who is there when we need them. And it's disappointing. It feels like so much time was wasted investing in friendships and it was never two sided, it appears. 

But to EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU who emailed me, sent me a card, texted me, messaged me on Facebook, sent me a care package, who constantly think of me and ask how I'm doing- THANK YOU. You have absolutely no idea what this summer was like for me emotionally, how hard I tried to pull it together and I just couldn't. It was these things that would come when I needed them the most and they kept me from going totally down the hole of depression doom. 

At this point, I'm better. I'm not great, I'm still scared for another pregnancy and I don't think that will fully go away until a baby is born, but I'm trying so hard every day to just push through and be positive. My heart aches for the women that deal with this repeatedly, I honest to god don't know how you do it because once is more than enough heartbreak in my life. 

TBT: Bubbles and Friends.

I've been organizing my picture files on my laptop for awhile now and lawd... I have found some doozies. But more importantly, I have found some pictures that I totally forgot about and that brought a smile to my face. Like this one.

Let me set this up for you.

So Matt and I were engaged in October 2002. I don't like to do things on odd years so I decided we were going to wait to get married until 2004. But sometime in the course of early 2003 I found a great deal on mini bottles of bubbles. At the time, bubbles were THE thing to do at weddings so I obviously bought 150 bottles. Then someone at work had all of this silver and blue ribbon they were going to throw away and those were my colors and it was fate, I tell you.

But anyone who knows me in real life knows I am such a pain in the ass when it comes to getting things done. I am that girl that gets as much done as far in advance as I can because I know at heart, I'm a procrastinator. If I let it sit, I'll be struggling all the way to the end to finish. And this wedding was going to be low budget and as stress free as I could make it. And to highlight how stress free it was? I had schedules for the day before and the day of for every person. Whatever your role in the wedding was, it was customized for you. Absolutely nobody could ever play the "I didn't know where I should be" card because I gave them dummy instructions.

Seriously, my OCD knows no bounds.

But my best friend and Maid of Honor, Lisa, is such a trooper. Honestly. It was just her and Matt's sister in my wedding party so poor Lisa got to listen to my crazy almost daily and to make matters worse, she was in three weddings that summer. Mine was the first, followed by her sister's two weeks later and then her friend two months after that. Lisa was literally, the best Maid of Honor I could have asked for.

So naturally, when it came down to tying two colors of ribbons on 150 bottles, I called on her and she came. We spent hours doing this. Doing this until our finger tips were numb. It was really the worst craft project ever. We got them all done in one evening and I packed them away.

Fast forward 9 months and it's the wedding. I diligently pulled out the box, brought them to the church to have them handed to guests as they exited pews. Only to discover that some of the bubbles evaporated. Like, some people got totally empty bottles and were completely confused. At that point, I didn't really care because what are you going to do? So us walking out into a neighborhood of bubbles turned out to be more like us walking out with random bubbles that looked like some kid in the neighborhood had been playing earlier. It wasn't quite the exit I had hoped for.

And by god- I still have that ribbon. It's out of sheer principle I don't throw it away. But I had this picture on my fridge for the longest time and I had forgotten all about it until my computer file sorting project. So thanks, Lisa- you were such a trooper and I don't think you know how much I appreciated your skills at tying ribbon (and curling!).

PS) Matt would like it noted that he hand embossed our wedding invitations. Sadly, no pictures of this exist but I will confirm that he did in fact hand emboss 125 wedding invitations. (I did the first 25 before deciding that was the worst project ever and that the groom should participate in this as well.)

Santa Monica

Do remember awhile back I was talking about doing posts about songs that for whatever reason, remain near and dear to me? And then I kind of forgot about it? Well today I was listening to my iPod on shuffle and this song came on and every single time- I'm forced to sing out loud.

Everclear: Santa Monica



When I hear this song, it brings me back to the summer before high school started. My best friend in the whole world at the time, Allena, and I were so into MTV's Alternative Nation, that she figured out a way to record the episodes onto VHS tapes, then record the audio onto cassette tapes. Which clearly dates me as far as age and I realize this sounds confusing to those of you under the age of 23. But trust me when I say, doing this resulted in the most amazing mix tapes, even if they sounded far away.

But this song was easily one of our favorites. We really thought this band was great, and we'd sing the entire album this came off verbatim, a capella. Because we were amazing 15 year olds.

This particular day I had spent the night at her house the night before so we could get ready for Spartan Camp, get our freshman year information and do picture day. After all of that, we were supposed to go to my house. Neither of our parents were around to give us a ride and we obviously couldn't drive, so we decided to walk the five miles to my house from hers in 100 degree heat. Somehow, we were wearing jackets and carrying a boat load of shit, decided to take the longer route past the oil refinery, and I'm pretty sure heat induced delirium happened. Because we sang this song repeatedly, all while picking up a random 2x4 chunk of wood, a hubcap, and a bunch of cat tails.

For no damn reason.

I had that chunk of wood for years. She actually still has the hubcap.

In hindsight, we were kind of odd.

But we were damn cool to us.

So every time I hear this song, it reminds me of hanging out with her and having her as my friend during some real formative years. She moved away in tenth grade and I never really recovered from that. But ninth grade was our year. We thought for sure we'd meet really hot rocker boyfriends in an AOL chat room and they would totally let us run away from them, and then we could become groupies and just go to concerts all of the time.

That didn't happen for either of us, but we could have been the real life Banger Sisters. (And if you don't know the greatness of that movie? We can't be friends.)

Who would hide your sex toys?

I don't know what page it was on yesterday, but that was the sentence that jumped out at me. And it could have been in the context of a lot of things, but for me- I took it as if hypothetically I were to die today, who would  hide my sex toys? Maybe sex toys can be used as a metaphor for just your clothes and other random vanilla things if you're too prudish to admit to having an entire drawer full.

And maybe a second box.

And that third box you hide in your closet to rotate through things.

Hypothetically, of course.

It wasn't always easy, for years I had huge groups of friends. I had all sorts of people I could hang out with. But it really does take one really shit hole of a situation to weed people out. And it happens so fast that sometimes you wonder what's worse- the original betrayal or finding that most of your friends disappear?

So when I think of this, it takes me no time to think of who would do this for me:

Tammy. My friend Tammy and I have been friends for ten years. Which doesn't seem like it's been that long but at the same time, how is it not longer? Her and I totally get each other and she has always been my go to friend when I have had major problems with Matt or just life in general. I know that no matter what happens, I can call Tammy at any time and she'll bail me out. Like the time I ripped my own nose ring out of my nose and had to go to her to help. And she made her husband basically re-pierce my nose. Or the time we drove to Hinckley for donuts in the middle of the night for no reason just so we could complain about our husbands. She is always my friend who is game for just about anything. She's easy going, laid back, I could trust her with any thing. Which is why, if it came down to it? Tammy would be my first choice to hide my sex toys.

Emily. Emily and I have been friends for a relatively short time, but she is hands down, the most positive, optimistic, easy going, carefree person I have ever known. No matter how bad things are, she always sees the positive, and you can't help absolutely loving life when you are around Emily. We met at work and I'm so glad we've stayed friends. She also is a fellow book slut and I know that if it came down to it, she would chip in wherever I needed her.

Amy. Amy is one of my longest running blog friends. I haven't actually met that many in real life, but she was the second, and she's been with me the longest. For all of the things we don't have in common, we both like adventure so I know that if I ever wanted to go on a crazy ass trip? I could probably count her in. And despite living a few hours apart, I talk to her the most often with almost daily emails. It's nice to always have someone I can email a raging email to!

Amy, Tammy, me, and Emily. Rochester, Minnesota for Amy's birthday way back in 2011. 

And I cannot friend my far away friends Shirley (Arizona), Shannon (Nebraska), Kimberly (Tennessee) Gini (Nebraska), and Jennifer (Michigan). All of them are blogger friends, all of them I adore for different reasons. Shannon just gets my humor and my love of book boyfriends, Gini is just hysterical and I want to be her when I grow up, Kimberly is also amazing and hilarious, Jennifer is a god damn riot and I just love her, and Shirley? Well I love Shirley. Shirley is my pretend lesbian lover friend. Shirley is the one I'll message when ben wa balls get very stuck. If I had to hide a body, I bet you anything Tammy and Shirley would help me dig a hole. Of all of my friends, I bet you Tammy and Shirley would get along the best because without even knowing each other, they have the most in common with me. We'd be a dangerous trio. 

And if you aren't mentioned? It doesn't mean I don't love you. I love you long time. It just means that you probably wouldn't know where my toys were (all of them) and would probably respond with a "oh hell no" if I had left it in my will for you to take care of it. And it's totally understandable, which is why I love you. I have to have the yangs to my yings.  

I'm just really thankful that I have such great friends that would hide my sex toys. I could trust all of them implicitly with anything. They don't judge me, they accept me and my crazy for what we are, and they love me despite it. They wouldn't even judge the things they found in the closet because they would just know it's something clearly I would do. Because I'm nuts and that's just how I am. 

But the lesson in this is that it's taken me all of these years to find this group of friends. I see kids on Facebook have all of this damn drama with their "friends" and yet.. continue to be friends. And then I look at my group and I'm lucky. I haven't ever fought with my friends. None of my friends would ever do anything to intentionally hurt my feelings or "get back at me" for anything. Maybe I just got lucky or maybe that's just what happens as you get older. But it's worth asking- who would hide your sex toys? 

It's good to be a blogger.

Every once in awhile, I get the question, "Why do you blog? Don't you care about putting it all out there?"

And the answer is always really simple. I blog because I've met some really amazing, wonderful, thoughtful, caring people out there. Most of these people have become actual friends for me and someday when I have money, I will have the most epic road trip traveling to see you all. And I don't mind putting it all out there because there are others out there like me. I think if I had someone like me that blogged that had a life like me, things wouldn't have been so hard for me back in the day. But somewhere out there, there is a youthful, fun loving mom, stressed out from day to day things, in a marriage she's working hard at who sometimes struggles with depression and the pressures of being good at everything. And maybe she relates to me.

Or maybe there is a guy out there that has a wife like me and maybe he gets her just a little bit more and sees what the other perspective is like.

Or maybe there is a complete opposite of me that sees me as a hot mess and feels better about themselves.

Whatever it is, hopefully I'm sometimes entertaining.

But back to great people. I've made some really good friends over the interwebs and sometimes you guys send me fun things. And these fun things, quite literally, ALWAYS when I need them the most. It's like you have a freaky radar on this. But it's true.

Today I came home to a really fun package from none other than Rose over at Spirit Phoenix. She has been with me since what feels like the beginning of my blog, and she's just been really great. I think way back when I won a giveaway on her blog and I got this really cool tote bag that I still use every week on my trip to the library, and I think of her every time I use it. But she's also really talented, and interesting, and she has adorable kids, and she just is the type of person I would love to coffee with because she's just so cool. So I knew that whatever was in this box was going to be awesome, I would love it, and it would make my day.

Then I saw her card and I got giddy. Like I started bouncing in my heeled boots and squealing.

Then I opened it. And full out squealed, scaring all of my pets, I started jumping in my heeled boots but because I'm not coordinated, I kind of fell and almost broke my ankle but I recovered because hello- my gift is breakable. And oh good lord it matches my office and it's like the PERFECT thing for my wall.

Jesus cripes is a counted cross stitched stoned goat! Could there ever BE a more appropriate gift for me? Huh? No. No there cannot be because it is amazing.

Even Matt rolled his eyes and said, "It's really nuts that total strangers just get you. Because even I wouldn't think of a good gift like this." That's right he wouldn't- guy who gets me a desk calendar for Christmas every year, despite I don't have a work desk to put it on. *sigh*

But look at Shaggy! Doesn't he fit perfectly on my wall? I even hung her card up on my bulletin board of awesome. So Shaggy looks at me, and he looks stoned, but happy. It's the closest to a real goat I'll ever get.

So THANK YOU, Rose. You are amazing, this was by far the highlight of my Day Quil induced haze of today. Thank you for being a blog reader, for taking the time to make this for me, to spend the expense to mail it to me. Just everything. Thank you.

That time when I was offered a mustache ride.

So this past weekend was a super fun weekend out with friends for their birthdays. I kind of get excited when my friends have birthdays because it's an excuse to go out AND I get to buy presents.

Three couples were all going to meet on Saturday at the Shout House in Minneapolis for dinner, drinks, and shenanigans. Obviously all three were had. It was supposed to be Matt and I, with Tammy and Chad (who we shared a hotel room with) and then we were all going to meet Emily and Cory. Good stuff. So on Thursday I was at work and our work study Amber pointed out that St. Louis Park (suburb of Minneapolis and subsequently where our hotel was) was pretty much ghetto. She then texted me a crime map that had a disturbing amount of dots. Fortunately for us, it ended up being in a really nice neighborhood near some pretty cool stuff and the hotel was nice.

Oh except for the fact the hallways smelled like the inside of a dumpster. But other than that, it was totally fine.

So here's a tip- if you are going to go to the Shout House I recommend that you get a reservation and then get there before 5. Because we were there around 4:15 and yeah- line already.

 I also recommend that you not even bother with food. It's typical bar food but your waitress isn't going to be very good and it'll take you almost 30 minutes to get your Coke. Not to mention the hour to get your chips and salsa. And then bring you your burger with no ketchup. And then not come back. And then, on top of it all, get everyone's bill wrong. BUT, the plus side is you'll walk out not paying for your husband's beers.

 But the best part, besides hanging out with some of my favorite people and singing along with the pianists and being some of the youngest people there, is that you will see pregnant people drinking beer!

Now some of you might be like, "Oh Sara- she clearly had a sandwich, that's why her belly is like that." And then I will say no, because when she turned a little more, clearly a 3-4 month old belly. I told Tammy I should start carrying around pamphlets on fetal alcohol syndrome or something.

Oh and then there was that awkward moment when a super huge guy with a porn mustache came over, in front of Matt, to tell me that he thinks I'm really hot and him and his friend Ben want to meet me. Of course, the rest of the people at the table crack up because hello- this not only happens all of the time, but this time Matt was RIGHT THERE. So I say that I didn't think my husband would appreciate if I did that, and he proceeds to tell me I'm really pretty, then says he's going to shake my husband's hand. So he does, and I'm standing there like, what the fuck, and he apparently tells Matt he's a really lucky guy and he should keep an eye out. Matt of course says nothing because he's deadpan on everything all of the time, and my friends crack up and keep teasing me about maybe taking a ride on the mustache. Because his friend also had a porno face thing going on and it wasn't working for either of them. But at least I can say I'm consistent when it comes to attracting the best the crowd has to offer.

Breaking Dawn- midnight movie, bare feet, cup frenzy, and condom head.

Maybe you didn't know this about me, but I'm a Twi-hard. I am and I am not ashamed of it. I have been counting down to Breaking Dawn since Eclipse came out and it definitely did not disappoint. Was Kristen Stewart amazing? No, but she never is and you just expect that her happy, sad, and constipated face all look the same. Was Robert dreamy? Of course. Is this the movie where Jacob reveals himself to be a pedophile that can lick his own ass (in theory)? Why yes. Yes, it is.

First off, we got to the theatre at 4:30 like crazy people and proceeded to make friends with the first two girls in line. The strategy here is that they open the first (and largest) theatre at 10 for seating, and if you are in the front you can go sit down in actual chairs, get your pick of seats, and get ramped up to sit for another two hours... just in a different location. But while waiting the just under six hours to do that, we admired the artwork.

 We got into a cup frenzy when we realized for the low price of $6.95, you can get a large soda in a collectible Twilight cup. So I went up and got one. And got a fucking Jacob cup. I hate Jacob. I can't be attracted to someone who, hypothetically, could lick his own ass. So then I decided to make Kate go up and get me an Edward cup. Unfortunately, the theatre people are pretty hard core and would not let you pick... and you guessed it, she comes back with a fucking Bella cup. I don't think KStew has any kind of discernible talent, so I don't want that. I decided at almost 10 that I would suck it up and try for a third time (just tally up what I've spent so far). I got another Jacob cup while my friend Tammy behind me? Got Edward. Not cool, man. Not cool.

But I decided it was either not meant to be or I could hope someone throws theirs away and I would dumpster dive. Don't question my love for Edward or even for Robert Pattinson, because RPatz was my date.

 I even had my "I love Vampires" shirt on. And blood red nails. I thought I grabbed my red lipstick but I apparently didn't.

The other bonus to sitting in a crowded room for two hours is that you notice the people around you. OH! Before I talk about that- let's talk about personal hygiene. The people behind us in the lobby (group of 6 or so) smelled horrible. So horrible that when it was close to 10 and we really had to squeeze in, I could barely breathe. It wasn't just me, Tammy and Lisa also had a hard time breathing while Kate and Angie were OK, but they were dealing with a woman who came drunk. I know. Class it up, right? But here's the thing- daily showering is kind of awesome. Not just for your own cleanliness, but because nobody wants to smell your stank ass. Seriously. Combine that with them chain smoking the entire time? The fact my lungs are still inflated is kind of a miracle.

Anyways.

So once we got in, we noticed some fun people around us. There was of course, your expected teenage couple on a date too nervous to make up but being over the top touchy feely it makes you want to barf. I can say 100% that I was not like the couple in front of us. I think I told Ang that this is how that show Teen Mom came about. That right there.

Then there was the woman with an unfortunately small hat for her head... and it made her head look like a ribbed for her pleasure condom.

 Or the person who thinks it's OK to stick her BARE FEET on some one's head rest. No, it's not ok. First off, it's November and it was damn cold that day- you have no business wearing no socks you freak. Second off, nobody wants your feet grazing their hair. What if you have a fungus? Now the person in front of them has foot fungus in their hair.

Anyways. I had other pictures but they were blurry and you can't really tell what they are meant to be. But the movie was good. It was pretty much what I expected it to be. The only thing I kind of didn't like was the birthing scene- first off, kind of gross and gory for PG 13? I covered my eyes and almost threw up once. I also love it how Edward is all holding the baby as Bella is dying and I'm all, "DUDE! Put the baby down!" and that is so typical guy. A woman pops a baby out and the dad is all, "Wow-- this is awesome" as the mom is all writhing in pain or dealing with a placenta, or having to get a shot in her va-jay-jay for stitches and just you know- completely oblivious. So rude. Anyways. I was also really wanting more sex scene. It better be more graphic in the deleted scenes on the DVD otherwise I'll be stabby. Fucking teenagers ruin everything.

But overall? It was a good time with some great friends. I'm already excited for the final installation of the series... and you know I'll be there at midnight. Or more realistically, at dinner time.

And for those of you who want to know.. did I ever get an Edward cup? Yes. Yes, I did. Because you know my stealthy ninja ways totally grabbed the cup from the schmoopy couple in front of me when it became clear they had more pressing issues to deal with than the cup. Then I also grabbed another one that someone foolishly left behind. So now I have two. And a Jacob cup. I gave my other Jacob cup to Angie because she loves him and I won't fault her for that because she's young and will see the light some day.

Rochester Girls Weekend

So this weekend I spent with some of my favorite friends on a girls weekend in Rochester, Minnesota. I've been there once to basically connect with Amy before our Milwaukee trip but basically didn't know anything about the area other than that's where Mayo Clinic is.

Our main adjective was to celebrate Amy's birthday but we figured we would throw in a touristy trolley ride and a comedy show in the mix. Basically- it was a jam packed but very fun weekend.

Me, Tammy and Emily left way early on Saturday morning so that we would have a really full day in Rochester considering that is about a four hour drive from us. We obviously stopped in Hinckley for drinks and snacks, but on our way out we saw this beast:

I am very sad I did not get a picture of the rapist van with a tricycle strapped to the top for you though because that really was a special sight.

Then obviously we had to stop to pee. Mostly Tammy because the one thing about her that I love and it cracks me up, is that she must have the world's smallest bladder. She did really great though, so I think our mini road trips together are conditioning her bladder. Anyways. We stopped in Cannon Falls but the first thing we saw was this grocery store. So we pull over and start walking through the store. Obviously, we couldn't find the restroom so we asked and was told to go through double doors that looked like the back room. And it actually was. But the bathroom smelled SO bad. Pretty much the equivalent to a dirty adult diaper. Times ten. It was also pretty filthy, but they have these dispensers:

 Conveniently, they were all empty and looked like they have been for quite some time. So here's where the bathroom was- this is just one side view because employees came and I felt like a spy.

 Once we got to Rochester we headed over to a hotel to get onto the trolley that does a tour of the city and talks about the history of Mayo Clinic. For $15 it was a damn good deal because I learned a lot of stuff. Most of which I'm not going to tell you about for the sake of time, but if you are in Rochester you should do that tour. Plus our trolley had a bell. It was kind of bad ass.

For dinner we met up with a couple of Amy's local friends at McGoon's, which is next door to the Goonies comedy club. The food was hella expensive for what it was and wasn't that great BUT... our server? Her name is J-Wow. She was absolutely terrible and I know we all left a shitty tip. Try to come back at least once to refill drinks. Especially when you only have 3 tables. Get your shit together honey.

 So here is a picture of me and the girls. I look kind of tall here but I wasn't wearing heels. So that was weird.

 Since we had time to kill we decided to head for drinks at O'Dooley's which is basically up the street. Very cool restaurant/bar that feels very "city" to me. The only down side was the hostesses. There were three of them, all very wonky looking. By that I mean they are size 0, fake baked tan, giant boobs and the most unfortunate hair extensions. See the blondie below.

 She was the better of the three. I think they are waiting for employment at Hooters or something. But O'Dooley's was fun and we got to meet more of Amy's friends that live there, both of which were named Amy. Which kind of was nice because then you don't have that awkward moment where you forget someones name. But they were really great and I enjoyed talking with them over drinks. The down side to O'Dooley's was that my one Pepsi? Was $6.50. Um, what the fuck? The nice thing about Duluth/Superior is that if you say you are the designated driver, your soda is free. Apparently not the case in Rochester, so bring cash, DD's.

After O'Dooley's we headed to another bar I can't remember the name of for a quick drink before heading back to Goonie's for the late night comedy show.

The comedy show? God I hope Amy got the opening woman on film because she was really horrible. She was an older woman- easily 60's, possibly even in her 70's who at one point lamented about Spanx. Then, just when you think that was done, she start pulling a pair of Spanx out of her pants and you are promptly grossed out. Honestly, I didn't think either of the two comedians after her were funny either. There were people laughing but I think this is one of those things that is awesome when you're drunk? I don't know. The downside of being that person that doesn't drink is that I don't always think things are as funny as my friends who have a beer or two do. But I really enjoyed hanging out with everyone and having the side convo's, because those alone were hysterical.

After the comedy we parted ways with everyone and got Amy home and headed to our hotel. The next day Emily, Tammy and I ended up going to IKEA and the Mall of America, but Amy had to pack for her big move to the Cities. But the highlight of that? Is that I found my sweater for the Ugly Sweater Christmas Party we're having in December. Oh, yes. We're doing it and we've got some kind of awesome plans in place. I just need to get more people on board because I think the more people we have dressed in hideous attire, the more fun it will be.

But it was a long weekend in a good way. You know it was successful when you can say, "God- is tomorrow Monday" because it feels like Friday was forever ago. We got home kind of late on Sunday but it was totally worth it. I am completely thankful that I have such great friends I love spending time with, and thankful for such an awesome husband who tells me to go do something fun. I don't think I could have gotten a better combination.

Happy Birthday to one of my most favorite people AND a coming soon!

I have to just say it....

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, AMY!!!!

We are going to have fun this weekend during girl's weekend where Tammy, Emily and I are driving to hang out with Amy for her birthday. A trolley, some comedy, some food, some drinks, lots will happen and I'm super excited. Look for that post sometime next week.

But today? I am driving down to the Mall of America to meet with Amy, have some lunch, do some shopping and OH YEAH, go to the Airborne Toxic Event concert today. WOO HOO. I am super excited about it and it feels like a fun weekend kick off basically. I hope, hope, hope they play this song tonight.



And I have to just mention this because if there was ever a person I am so thankful for having, it's Amy. She is the best friend and she is so kind and you know how I know this? Because on her birthday week, this is what I got in the mail:

Cake decorating goodies. Seriously, Amy? I love you to bits. :) I had a shit day yesterday and to come home to find this completely made my day and made me love you even more. So happy birthday, friend! We're going to have fun tonight and this weekend.

And for the rest of you? Havea great day/night. Email me questions for Dear Sara tomorrow to sarastrand9438(at)hotmail(dot)com and you know I charged my camera battery fully this time.

I apparently like being Chicago's bitch.

Call me crazy but I love Chicago even with it's high crime, drunken and cracked out homeless people in the fetal position on sidewalks and obsessive honking for no reason. I do. I can't help it.

Which is where I was this past Friday and Saturday, which is why you didn't get posts either of those days. I had the laptop but I figured screw it because I was too tired to give you anything worth while anyways. But that just means I spent more time walking the streets of downtown Chicago to give you this post. I'm a giver like that.

So Friday it starts with us obviously driving the about 8 hours it takes to get to Chicago. Somewhere along the way I had to pee. Obviously. But the cool part is I *finally* got to stop at this food court (there are two of these on the way to Chicago but we stopped at only one of them) that is literally above the highway. It's like a giant sky walk food court and there is a gas station on the side. I've driven to Chicago three times now and I'm just happy to be able to say I've waved at cars like a maniac from the sky walk food court. Never mind we were almost run over by the guy cleaning floors with some giant machine on wheels. Like four times.

No, the thing to mention is that the bathrooms here? Have terrible walls. You know I'm a big critic of public restrooms and although Michigan wins the award for grossest bathrooms ever, this one had bizarre walls that made me instantly dizzy.

 Seriously imagine being surrounded by this. I was so dizzy I felt like a drunk trying to aim into the bowl since of course I'm doing the hovered stance because there is no way my actual ass is touching the seat. It was a challenge, let's just leave it at that.

Once we got to Chicago we checked into our hotel which was super great. It was the Double Tree on East Ohio, and it's great because it's in between Navy Pier and the Magnificent Mile so that's handy. After checking in, getting our kind of disgusting warm cookie (they say it's free but you know you're paying for it) we decided to ask the concierge how to get to Gino's East from our hotel since we were just going to walk it. It ended up being 10 blocks, but because I was all "I'm a lost tourist but I'm super friendly" to the concierge, she gave us this nifty pass to not have a wait time to get in. SCORE. It turned out to be a super score because while we waited maybe 5 minutes, we were able to eat and get out in about 90 minutes, and nobody had budged in the line when we came in. See? Being awesome gets you things in life.

 This is my crazy, "I didn't realize I was getting my picture taken face" while texting my friend Emily.

 But then I was all, "Aw.. picture with my friend Tammy!" and so I look normal. Plus, we look great together.

 And then I got a good one of Matt and Chad against the graffiti wall. And yet AGAIN I forgot to bring a neon puffy paint marker. Failure.

 But leave it to those boys to find the penis picture on their seat. AND point it out.

Finally, after like 45 minutes our pizzas came. Tammy and I (picky eaters) shared one and Matt and Chad (human garbage disposals) shared one. Oh, and our little concierge person gave us a ticket for free breadsticks. I can't speak highly enough about this woman.. she rocked out night for sure. Anyways. The pizza was delicious.

 mmmmm....

So after eating pizza we decided to walk around downtown a bit. I ended up getting a cute shirt at H&M along with a kick ass hair clip and some tights for Olivia. By then we were all kind of exhausted so we headed back to our room.

At this point, I was trying to return some emails and Matt was watching some TV when we get a frantic knock on our door. It was Chad to inform us that hey- you can't lift anything off of that little tray of snacks because you get charged for it. Which was kind of shit because we were picking them up wondering how they have the balls to charge $6 for a bag of M&M's, so Chad made sure that nobody was charged. ROBBERY, this is.

 Anyways. We slept great. We got up early, went to Dunkin Donuts for breakfast and headed to Navy Pier. And just an aside- but is there a rule that every Dunkin Donuts is fully staffed with people who barely speak English? Because poor Matt ordered a sandwich and they kept asking him about what donut. I think he ended up with a sad slice of egg (yes, it was a slice... ew) on some weird bread. Anyways. We started walking to Navy Pier only to find... Ohio Street Beach.

 Kind of awesome to have a beach in the middle of downtown??

 So from there we made it to Navy Pier only to find that there is a weird display of wooden signs that read "Fix-Ice Machene". Now, I don't know if this is something with meaning but they spelled machine wrong. Is the Chicago educational system that bad? And why has nobody said to the artist, "Dude- you spelled it wrong. People will think this entire city is full of uneducated dumbasses."?? I don't know. Nobody seemed to know what it meant either.

 But... Navy Pier! This was my first time there, but both of my previous trips didn't allow for time to see it so I totally put my foot down and said- we ARE seeing Navy Pier.

 And guess what? They have a Billy Goat Tavern! That serves Horny Goat mixed drinks!

 While I didn't partake in that since they weren't open, I settled for a picture under the sign.

The other reason I wanted to go to Navy Pier besides it's awesome was because I wanted to ride on a sailboat for my 30/30 list. And since I don't half ass anything, I rode on a tall ship (like a pirate ship.. and this one had a super awesome and knowledgeable pirate narrator!) with massive sails. It was great.

 And the view was kind of amazing despite fog.

 And I basically learned a lot about Chicago, the coastline, etc. Did you know everything east of Lower Michigan Avenue used to be the water? After their massive fires in late 1800's, the city basically flattened the ashes of the old downtown and that's what makes up the east of Lower Michigan Avenue. They also have a rule you can't build tall building there to ruin the skyline, but this black building? Gets around that rule because it's not built on the ground but rather on stilts.

 The sails!

 The view!

After the boat tour we headed to lunch where the boys got authentic Chicago hotdogs. *barf*

 I obviously had a hamburger. Then we took a bus tour of downtown where Chad's chest photo bombed our picture.

 We saw the bean.

 Oh man. It was about 4pm by the time we got into my van to go home. I was kind of exhausted from walking. Which was unfortunate, because it took us exactly one hour and 15 minutes to get out of Chicago.

 We drove for hours until we decided it was time to eat dinner. But by god.. like a beacon on the horizon I saw a Cracker Barrel. You'll remember from my Tennessee trip the amazingness of such a place. And you know I beelined for the jar of sugar suckers. I literally spent my last $12 on ten of these bad boys.

 Matt wouldn't even walk next to me because he was embarrassed. But after leaving the restaurant it was a long drive home. I can't even emphasize how long that drive home was. Usually I get home from Chicago around 10 or 10:30 at night but since we left so much later than usual, we pulled up at our house at 1:30 a.m. Ugh. To say I was a lazy fat ass on Sunday? Understatement.

Overall it was a great trip. I had a lot of fun, I enjoy being a tourist, I learned a lot, and best of all- I'm itching to go back. This time I'd like to go back in March for St. Patricks when they dye the river green. AND I want to go to a play at the Chicago Theatre or somewhere. So we'll see. ;)

Vampires, Birds or Mosquitos? Hard to tell.

So tonight is all about Tahquamenon Falls and how we almost died of blood loss. 'Tis true friends.

On Friday evening we ended up driving to the lower Tahquamenon Falls because there is some driving distance between lower/upper and yeah. It just made sense. It was kind of drizzling but not bad and I told the group that if it was raining, I was OK with running to get my picture and running back to the vehicle. I wasn't about to make people get pneumonia and shit.

So while the rain wasn't an issue the mother effer mosquitoes were. Seriously. They were after us. Mostly Jon though. But they were sucking us dry, they were big enough that you could see the stripes on their ass and they made whizzing noises by your ear.  Seriously. They were out of control.

 Lower Falls... pretty, huh? You'll notice Matt and I here are hoods up. We snapped and we hustled. Those mosquitoes were no joke folks.

 On Saturday we woke up to pouring rain and even colder temperatures. BUT we braved it. This time we all remembered to bring our bug spray. And we all suckered up and bought ponchos which looked exactly like white Hefty bags, yall. So here's the upper falls:

 Matt and I modeling the Spring 2011 Hefty collection. I sprayed us down, then the freaking bags down with bug spray. I also inhaled/ate some bug spray. I don't suggest it... it tastes terrible.

 Some super nice hard core hiker guys (who didn't have ponchos on) took out group picture. You'll notice that Jennifer and I had our hands into our sweatshirts.

 It was also fun because there was a sign that said "94 Steps to Brink". Um, no joke yo. Again, it was only 94 steps one way and by the time I got back to the top I felt like I did enough stairs for awhile. But it was worth it.

These falls are absolutely beautiful. I have such a love of waterfalls. Some day I'd like to swim under one. That seams like that would be kind of awesome, right?

So I've crossed yet another thing off my 30/30 list. Woo! I am really glad that I drove the distance to see these because they were beautiful. Plus I would really like to take up hiking with legit gear and stuff. It would have been fun to go into the woods but yeah. We weren't prepared for the bug overload.

Tomorrow is Dear Sara-- send your questions to: sarastrand9438(at)hotmail(dot)com bitches! :)