Wednesday, September 8, 2010

These are my confessions.

I have no snazzy way to introduce my latest confession. And honestly? This is really the first time that I'm admitting it to myself because guess what? It's really hard to deal with on your own.

I? Am a shop-a-holic.

And by that I don't mean that I buy super expensive things and own a bunch of fabulous stuff. That's actually not the case at all. Pretty much the only difference between normal shopping sprees and a real shopping addiction is the fact that finances be damned- you are still out there shopping. And that is definitely me. If I feel bummed out or sad, I shop. If I'm ever bored (which really isn't often), I shop.

Let's say I'm making my weekly trip to Target for house stuff. I'm loaded with coupons and I'm doing really well. If I see something I want (a book, a cd, a shirt, a necklace, a purse, or some other random thing I don't need in my house) I put it in my cart. Then I roll around for awhile, take it out. I should know better- I don't have the extra money. Then I have the ability to talk myself into it and leave the store before I change my mind. I will literally hold something in my hands and pace until I no longer feel guilty about the purchase. If I have an extra $100 in my paycheck? It is gone within hours of my paycheck being deposited. It's like I can't help it.

But usually when I get home and start looking at the things I've bought- I get sick. I'm seriously sick knowing that all the money I just spent I could have used on house stuff. My savings. Whatever.

I can spread $50 over two weeks for necessities like you wouldn't believe. But give me $50 for two weeks of fun stuff? And I feel like Lindsay Lohan being taunted with a crack bowl.

So after watching a show about shopping addiction about two months ago I decided that I had to be done. While I'm not able to completely cut myself off I've given myself an allowance. The rest of what I would have spent needs to go back into the savings. I won't lie- it is AWFUL. I have to avoid some stores because I just can't do it. My next problem is that almost all of my clothes are too big for me. Which is a really nice problem except that I know that I have to gradually buy new pieces. One at a time and for as cheaply as possible.

The one thing I have had a REALLY hard time cutting back on is my scrapbooking stuff. Especially now that my only scrapbook store (we have a Michaels, but it's not as awesome) is closing at the end of this month so that will make that problem a bit easier. But until then? The clearance sales??? Is killing me knowing I could be buying that stuff.

I will admit- seeing my savings account having a positive balance that is steadily climbing DOES help. It is nice having the extra $20 to take the kids for happy meal dates on Fridays. It is really nice to be able to buy a movie and not freak out if I'll have enough gas money for the next week.

But it's hard. It's probably the hardest thing I have ever had to do.

Fortunately, one of my super awesome and wonderful and fabulous blog readers, Amber, surprised me with an entire box of goodies. I almost cried when I opened the box up. She had no idea of what a struggle I've been having since I'm running out of stuff for the kids' scrapbooks so the fact she literally loaded me down with awesome stuff is amazing. I won't lie- my panties were totally wet going through it all.
I mean, seriously. It took me forever to put it all away because I just don't have a huge space to begin with!


So Amber- you rock my world in more ways than one. You are one of my favorite blog readers (and commenter!), I love our back and forth emails AND I think we'd be kick ass real life friends. I'm way cooler than the churchy ladies you hang out with. ;)

But with that- do you struggle with a shopping addiction? How do you manage it?

10 comments:

Jandy xx said...

hmm, when my first boyfriend and I broke up and I was devestated, my mum said to go get a myer store card and spol myself (myer is a huge department store that has everything) so i did, and ever since, when i'm feeling a bit down, i NEED to shop, also, I hate my hair, so i have a bad habit of buying hair extensions on ebay! being with a spendaholic, who would put either of us to shame has certainly curbed my shopping though, through no choice of my own! I can have $50 that will sit in my wallet for a week, Steve? couldnt hav it last more that 2 hours, no exageration, though he spends it on alcohol and smokes, he never has anything to show for it. So, after my essay of a comment there, I don't really have any advice, except that it does feel a hell of a lot better to shop with money youve saved for that reason, than to shop with money you dont really have! xx

Krysten @ Why Girls Are Weird said...

Sara I am the EXACT same way. Imagine how hard it is for me to work at Maurice's! It KILLS me to see my boss drop $130 on clothes in one night like it's nothing, especially when I see how much she can get because of our discount. KILLS ME.

I think it's good that you realize what's up and you're working to fix it. And how amazing is it to have all that wonderful scrapbooking stuff. Seriously, blog friends are the best friends.

Danielle said...

Now that I've seen the pics of the super huge box of scrapbook stuff you got I'm even more jealous than yesterday!!!! UGH! Lucky bitch!! :)

I would say that I have a problem with shopping as well, although I haven't really taken the time to work on it, so I guess it is currently still a problem. I constantly am spending money on scrapbooking supplies and books ... that's it. But I do it without thinking. I'll go to Joanns allotting myself $20 and leave spending $40 ... the problem? I don't feel guilty. :( Oops.

Keep your head up ... at least your addiction is shopping, I mean it could be worse, right? You could be smoking crack or something! Just sayin.

Alpha Za said...

I don't really shop. But when I buy something, it's because it's so awesome that I'd want to wear it again and again and again. It's a process. I buy rarely.

Anonymous said...

Shopping additions? ME?? Um, maybe just a little!!

The only reason I have not been overboard lately is because of NO MONEY! It was nothing for me to drop a sizeable amount in Traget, a scrapbooking store, the Gap, or god forbid AMAZON. I have not been limited, I just had to stop. I would feel the same way after a binge, I would look at the stuff and think "what the fuck did I just do?". So what was the solution for me feeling shitty? SHOP MORE!

I saved and saved and saved for 11 months for that scrapbooking convention, so I didn't feel very guilty about the money I spent.

I am just glad you like your stuff!! I was really surprised that I got so much for so little. I set a goal amount, but also said to myself, if I can get ANYTHING for free, it will go in her box! So needless to say, it got filled quickly!!

And yes, we would be total besties in real life. It would be the coolest!!

PS: For everyone out there....I don't ALWAYS hang out with churchy le femmes, it is just that the majority of the scrapbookers happen to be the churchy type.....don't get it twisted!

[hearts]

Chicken said...

How sweet of Amber! Yay for you, now you can get creative again without breaking the bank. I think that you should keep your shopping in check. I would like to keep my perfect streak of not knowing anyone that has ever been on Horders. They'll find your cats skeletons under a big pile of crafts.

Kattrina said...

Hi Darling! I hate shopping and still have a shopping problem. I think the problem was that for a bit I was making a decent amount of money for my one lonely self but then I got married and I have to support my hubs until he finds a steady job and so I'm broke. I just haven't realized it yet. So, I am super super strict and have to walk around in hideous shoes cuz I can't afford to buy new ones. And I am not allowed to go to Target or Borders because I can't control myself - I literally spend more money buying toiletries at the grocery store because I can't NOT spend $100 at Target even if I just need toothpaste. It's sad.
Good luck - and what an angel Amber is for sending you that stuff!

Nicki said...

O MAN. I really cannot go into any scrapbooking store without filling a basket. It's a problem. So what if that lopsided pumpkin stamp looks more like a creepily grinning onion? IT IS ON SALE, PEOPLE.

Amber, you must be the sweetest person in the world for sending that big ole box of goodies!

Happy Scrapping!

Another David said...

i have this terrible habit of commenting on a few words from a post rather than the entire post, and this one will be no different. so here goes:

personally, i like the new badass coked out linday lohan. not gonna lie, it's kinda hot. not that i'm into coke whores, but sometimes they're fun.

Gini said...

YOU GO, SARA!

I struggled with a shopping addiction through college and post drop-out. I'd go to the mall instead of studying and charge shitloads of stuff-- cute clothes, dorm accessories, house items I had no place to store. I stopped when I was declined for a fourth credit card; I just had to quit cold turkey, cut up the cards and sit on my damn hands. It SUCKED, all out fucking SUCKED ASS.

Luckily for me, I've managed to pay it all off over the past ten years. Now I only have one card and I generally keep a balance of less than $500 on it. My credit's recovered nicely. And now I kind of hate shopping. (except online, teehee)