Friday, August 24, 2018

I may have lost some intestines.

Alright, I'm telling you right now if you get grossed out easily, just walk away now. I'm going to tell a story that isn't for the folks with a weak constitution. I'm disgusted by it and it happened to me so that's saying something.

Now that the disclaimer is out of the way...

So I did my follow up with the gastroenterologist, and I saw a nurse practitioner for the doctor. She was pretty amazing and I liked her a lot. She gave me lots of information, and that was really nice. She talked to me about Barrett's Esophagus, which sounds like a treat, and explained how all of my conditions contribute to slow motility constipation and how I have to really be on top of that and to keep things moving.

(I know, you thought you'd never know so much about me, did you??)

Which OK, I know all of that. She tells me I'll go for a Hida scan of my gallbladder because maybe my pain is that (spoiler: scan was fine, my gallbladder is just fine), but she thinks she's going to prescribe me Linzess for the constipation. She says I might have some "discomfort" for a short period but that over time this is pretty successful for people.

I say alright because if the constipation is the source of pain I am 100% on board with a med to fix that because this pain is awful. She tells me NOTHING ELSE about this drug. I see a ton of commercials for it so I figure it's well used and probably fine.

I didn't start the medication right away because I had all of these concerts and I didn't want to be sick during them because that would suck.


I take my first pill this past Monday. I took it with all of my other pills (which I need to show you how much I'm taking- it's obscene) and thought nothing of it. I had a bowl of cereal for lunch. I had my one can of soda in the afternoon. At around 3 p.m. I started having horrible pain. Honestly, it was like nothing I've ever had. Then I thought, oh man- I have to go to the bathroom. Like right now. Like I might not make it crisis.

I did not make it.

I'm sitting in my hallway that goes from my kitchen to the downstairs bathroom like, WHAT THE HELL JUST HAPPENED?! Then I get to the bathroom and try to figure out my game plan and it starts again.

You guys- I have never in all of my life had explosive diarrhea. Never, ever. I've had stomach bugs that gave you diarrhea but it was always reasonable and manageable. I can count on one hand how many times I've taken Pepto-Bismol,  I seriously have never been in this situation. So I clean everything up, literally run through my house half naked and put different clothes on. Alright. No problem. I've got this.

Then it happens again. It's only been 15 minutes at this point and I am absolutely certain everything I had eaten over the last two days is now out. I figure this can't possibly keep up. I start drinking water because I don't want to get dehydrated and I take an extra hydrocortisone which I need to do if I get sick like this. I feel like I'm handling it.

Then it starts again. I have now been on the toilet four or five times in a half hour. I start Googling severe diarrhea. It's like 10 times over 24 hours. I'm certain I will pass that within the hour. I see on the Linzess insert that some people report diarrhea. Awesome. I decide I should call the gastro and just ask, because maybe this isn't normal.

Do you know what she says? She says this is what she meant by "discomfort" and that this could last, (wait for it).... TWO WEEKS.

I'm sorry, WHAT?!

So I tell her that she should be more clear because explosive diarrhea is not what I would consider "discomfort". Honest to god.

I have no adult diapers handy (because WHO DOES) so I fashion one out of 3 maxi pads. It was quite the look. I am now worried about going to sleep, will it just keep happening? I didn't even eat dinner because my intestines were screaming from the overworked afternoon they've had. I go to bed hungry.

Enter Tuesday. I'm now scared to take it. But I'm like, it can't be as bad, right? Surely with nothing left in my intestines it'll be OK?

It was not OK. I was on the toilet so much that I had a seat impression on the back of my legs that didn't go away all day. I hardly ate.

Wednesday was slightly better, it wasn't explosive anymore but still, anything I eat or drink comes out almost immediately.

Thursday has been OK. Again, still not normal bowel movements but I've worn the same pair of pants all day so that's a win!!

The best part is next week I have the preschool home visit and I have a concert I'm taking Olivia too so I really, really, REALLY hope this kind of goes away because diarrhea and any of these obligations are not going to go well together.

So long story short, Linzess is the devil and you will lose your bowels. On the bright side, I might be losing weight from it so YAY.


Beth (Coffee Until Cocktails) said...

OH my gosh I can't even imagine. I am sorry you are dealing with that! I have to say it reminds me of a friend of our family who had to do prep for a colonoscopy and somehow didn't take the medication until he was going to bed for the night and well, his bed ended up a mess. I hope it starts leveling off to more normalcy soon!

Julie H said...

Holy crap! Literally lol. I probably would have stopped taking it.

Kim {Hope Whispers} said...

Girl! I have been there! Lord have I ever. Who am I kidding. I live in these shoes. I have to take lactulose daily. Usually once or twice, but its prescribed for 3x daily. Yeah, not happening. Your day one, is my every day. When people ask me why I can't work....does the job come with a toilet desk? LOL I am praying that things settle down for you and you can get on a more regular schedule! Im sorry you had to go through all that though. But for real, I feel ya! Don't forget to stay hydrated!!!

Unknown said...

I love you and I'm sorry but I busted up laughing at "I did not make it." I'M SO SORRY!!!! THIS SOUNDS LIKE THE WORST SIDE EFFECT EVER!

Shooting Stars Mag said...

Oh my god, Sara! This is the WORST! I really hope this coming week is better for you - just in general, but also because you have things coming up. Your doctor is crazy though - how is what you're going through DISCOMFORT??? Not cool.


Julie said...

Yeah, discomfort and explosive diarrhea that keeps you tied to the toilet are very different. I can’t believe she didn’t do a better job of explaining thst. Glad it’s starting to get better. And that you can wear one pair of pants the whole day. I get random allergy attacks and when it hits everything leaves my body from both ends. So I can kind of relate to your story.

Garla Armstrong said...

I thought I was gonna die from it. Chest heart burb bs weak vomit gas stomach pain. Mucus gas couldn't sleep. Server dehydration foul taste n mouth smells high blood pressure. Only on it for 2 weeks. Been off if it one day. It's poison