The last two weeks have been pretty up and down with my mood. Some days I feel almost like my old self and then the next day it all comes crashing down and I feel like I'm in the worst hole of my life. It's hard to decide if a new anti-depressant is working when life is like that. I mean, do I shoot for 2-3 good days and decide that the medicine is working? Should I have good days every day? Most days? I don't know. I'm just so tired and frustrated with it all. I go back to the Mayo Clinic in Rochester, Minnesota on August 28 (next Monday) but that's for endocrinology and I have a list of questions, hopefully I'll leave there feeling better than last time.
I just found my camera and realized I never took the pictures from Lucy's party off it, so I thought I'd share a few with you.
I love this picture so much, not just because my niece is in it, but because it showcases everyone's personality. Adriana is friendly and quiet, Lucy is interested and the observer, and Penelope is Penelope, rolling around in the background.
This is how you'll find Penelope most days now. She's going to be a gymnast whereas Olivia had exactly zero interest in flipping and tumbling around.
Penelope and Adriana are only six months apart in age, so it's really fun seeing them play together. Penelope is so wild and full of it and poor Adriana was like, "Settle down, kid". HA!
Lucy got a bunch of great gifts we've been enjoying since her party. It's so nice to have different things for her and Penelope to fight over.
But this one year old is walking! Well, she's taking the tentative steps without hanging onto anything but then she feels unsure or unsteady and goes back to crawling as fast as she can. She loves this pony toy my mom got her and can get on and off by herself, and she'll just sit there rocking on it. It's pretty adorable.
I love, love, LOVE this picture. I am so glad I finally got a picture of her making this face because my favorite thing about Lucy is her excited expression. She makes this face anytime she's excited, when she sees food, or right before she gets angry because she wants something Penelope has.
She's just now getting to the age where she will fight back for what she wants. Thankfully Penelope is coming around and plays nicer with her, but some days it's really tough. Having two so close in age isn't ideal, I don't care what anyone says. If anyone asks me I'm going to vehemently argue against having two so close together.
Most of the time though she is the sweetest love bug. She's content to sit on your lap and cuddle, she likes to take things out of containers, she still wants to be rocked to sleep snuggled next to you, she randomly gives hugs and kisses, and is very ticklish. I really love her. I don't remember rocking and snuggling her when she was younger, I'm sure I did it I just don't remember, so now when I rock her I try so hard to bank it in my memory so I don't forget. I don't remember her baby smell, the sound of her coos, or the looks of adoration she gives, I so badly want to remember something.
Certainly not to be outdone, but Penelope is a mini rock star at potty training. We've been doing it about two weeks now, with the first day by far being the worst. I went to bed in full tears convinced we'd have to wait until the summer before kindergarten to potty train. The next morning I got up, fully dejected, and just said to her that we need to really try to get to the potty.
And that was that. She just did it. I don't know if she sensed my desperation or it was obvious even to a two year old that I was ready to lose it. Either way, I'm grateful.
We still have accidents here and there (usually when she's eating or really engrossed in an activity), and we wear a diaper or pull up for nap time, bed time, and if we go out, because it'll be awhile yet. But it's been GREAT not changing so many diapers in a day. She's a fan of panties so we have a basket full of Trolls, Minnie Mouse, Dory, and plain panties (I swear we must have 20 pairs) and she takes great care picking out a new pair every time she goes. Oh yes, she has to be stark naked to use the potty but that is not the hill I want to die on so we're going with it for now.
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