Saturday, December 11, 2021

Book Review: The Flirtation Experiment

Well, I'm behind in life... as usual. Actually, all of this week was mostly spent laying in bed because vertigo strikes again. I also started having tremors but only in my torso, arms, hands, and head, so that was fun. I have no idea what is causing them, but I've increased my cortisol treatment in the hopes I've just got some weird thing and my body needs extra help fighting it off. I have no idea, it's really just a guessing game anymore. 

The only good part was I got to read a little more! Well, at least until the tremors made the book move too much and I got dizzy. I'm a super fun time, y'all. 

The Flirtation Experiment  

Lisa Jacobson and Phylicia Masonheimer

Romance novels, Hallmark movies . . . the immense demand for romantic stories reveals a deep, unsatisfied longing that can be found in many marriages, but does it have to be that way? Is it possible that the best marriage has to offer can grow, rather than fade after you say “I do”? Lisa and Phylicia say, “Absolutely yes!” 

So what is the secret to a happy, thriving, loving marriage, where the fire of romance and close friendship do not fade? While The Flirtation Experiment includes the frisky side of marriage, it’s far more than a good romp. By degrees, each chapter takes you to a deeper place, covering themes every beautiful marriage has in common, such as covenant, healing, and hope. 

After reading The Flirtation Experiment, wives will be filled with hope and encouragement for how they can make a powerful, positive change in their marriages, become empowered to pursue their husbands romantically, understand the Bible invites women to be proactive in their marriages, be motivated to consistently love in creative ways, and forge closeness and intimacy in their marriages. 

In June Matt and I will celebrate our 18th wedding anniversary, and that seems crazy to me. It's equal parts of feeling like it's been an eternity with him, and then other times I feel like it can't possibly be that long already. I always tell people that anything that could be thrown at a marriage has been thrown at us at some point. We've done the richer or poorer thing, we've done sickness and in health, we've dealt with financial highs and lows, literally every milestone people our age could deal with, and we've definitely had good times and bad, but we still keep plugging along. Not that it has been a smooth or easy road, but I think we just both made a conscious decision we were going to make this work, somehow, some way. 

One of the challenges that we, and most other couples, face is keeping that spark alive. I always laugh when I hear people say, "I love him but I'm not in love with him" because to me, that's insanity. The love you feel at the beginning isn't meant to last. Things change as you change, and you just have to go with it. 

So let's talk about this book, it is a rather quick read, so I'm confident you can get through it in a weekend easily. Matt and I aren't particularly religious so while the book does feature a Christian approach to marriage, there is still a lot of things to take away from it that you'll find useful in your own marriage. One thing that was a huge learning moment for me in our early years of marriage is that a fear of intimacy can manifest as anger. The authors mention that "anger can be a gut-level response to fear of loss, fear of intimacy, or fear of failure. In my case, I lashed out at Josh whenever I felt like I was failing." 

Hi- I'm fully guilty of that. I know that I get angry with or towards Matt when I'm stressed out, I'm overwhelmed, I'm anxious, I feel like I really suck at life. I think we all do that at some point. It's taken me a lot of years to make myself pause and really ask myself WHY am I so angry right now? Does yelling at anyone really help this situation? Do I get it right every time? Good lord no. I try really hard though and I think that's something that comes with getting older and gaining maturity, too. 

Overall, this was alright. I'd give it a solid 3 stars for me but I think that's also because again, we aren't particularly religious, so a lot of the Bible references weren't relevant to us. I think if you have a relatively good marriage, this might be helpful to make it better, or work on some areas that need improvement. If your marriage is really struggling, this isn't going to get you out of the ditch, so to speak. It is a pretty quick read though, and the humor throughout really helped this from feeling like a self-help but rather, an informative counseling session with a friend who has been there and done that. 

Thank you to TLC Book Tours for sending me a copy for review and having me on this tour! 

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1 comment:

Shooting Stars Mag said...

Definitely seems like it would be best for a couple that is more religious. Glad it was a quick read that didn't feel too preachy though!